Minds Apart
by PaulFSAC
Summary: Fry messes about with one of the Farnsworths inventions and as a result he and Leela get to see life from a whole new perspective - Part II now available
1. Default Chapter

MINDS APART  
  
"Good news everyone," said Farnsworth approaching the meeting table.  
  
"I've been invited to attend this years LUNATIC awards on the West Coast.  
  
"Lunatic?" asked Fry, bewildered. Yikes! He's actually admitting he's insane, he thought.  
  
"You've never heard of The LUNATIC awards Fry?" asked Leela  
  
"Uh, eh, no can't say I have" answered Fry.  
  
"It's the Los Angeles, Universal And NATional Inventors Conference," said Amy " it's very prestigious, only the best scientists and inventors are asked to attend"  
  
"How the hell did old urine pants get an invite then?" Asked Bender.  
  
"Apparently there is a joke in the name but I'm blowed if I can find it" said Farnsworth.  
  
"Uh huh" said Fry, twirling his finger next to his ear.  
  
He felt someone kick him beneath the table, Leela coughed and looked at him. He got the hint.  
  
"So when do you leave?" asked Leela.  
  
"Today" answered the Professor "Now if you'll excuse me I have to go pack and write my dictators victory speech, I, er, I mean my award winners speech."  
  
With that Farnsworth disappeared upstairs to his apartment.  
  
"Ok den people" said Hermes, "Now as dere is no delivery today other than dropping off the Professor…"  
  
"I know where I'd like to drop him off," said Bender, interrupting  
  
"…I suggest dat we give the building a good clean and general tidy up, prior to him leaving" Continued Hermes "We don't want to give da customers a bad impression"  
  
"Then how come Fry still works here then?" Asked Bender with a malicious chuckle.  
  
"Hey" said Fry.  
  
*****************************************************************  
  
A short time later found the staff of Planet Express busying themselves, cleaning up the interior of the building,  
  
Leela was in the ships hanger sorting through the crates of packing materials and spare parts for the ships. Dr Zoidberg was in the medical room,  
  
"Hmm I better check ze expiry dates on ze contents of the medical supplies"  
  
He opened the pharmaceuticals cupboard and began to check the individual bottles and containers  
  
"Letz zee, Ok… Too… berrr 2987," said Dr Zoidberg "vell I zink zats still good for a while, Jan…oo… harry 2993, yes zats ok…"  
  
Amy was tidying up the meeting table area, chipping Fry's used gum off the underside of the table,  
  
"Ewwww, this ones all hairy" she screamed.  
  
Bender was cleaning up the TV lounge and inspecting the comfort of the couch and the efficiency of the television at displaying the 'All My Circuits' omnibus.  
  
Fry was in the professor's lab; he was looking at the professors black board.  
  
"Man," said Fry "they say my spellings bad, but the professors is even worse, he gets letters, numbers and plus's all mixed up together, I don't even know what this is, a sum or a sentence"  
  
He looked at the characters on the board, written in Farnsworth's scrawl  
  
E=MC2 = (G + C3-(x(15x(M x2(((((0.5(x2(  
  
"Meh" said Fry pressing the boards erase button. The Formula disappeared  
  
Fry looked around the lab; his eyes fell upon a strange looking device sitting on a trolley in one corner of the lab.  
  
The Device looked similar to two submarine periscope eyepieces connected by some complex looking electronic components.  
  
Above the eyepieces were metal skullcaps like those on an electric chair. Either side of the eyepieces where earpieces and below these where a keyboard and a pistol grip, and trigger arrangement.  
  
  
  
"Cool the professors built a videogame," he said twisting some knobs and pressing buttons randomly  
  
Fry stood in front of the machine and looked through the eyepiece, he noticed that he could see right through the device and out the other eyepiece  
  
The device started up automatically, a boot up sequence appeared.  
  
"ST Boot-up Sequence Initialised"  
  
  
  
A list of checks began to scroll up past his eyes on the transparent screen between the eyepieces  
  
"Coool" said Fry " wonder what it's about"  
  
  
  
At that moment an eye, fringed by purple hair appeared at the other eyepiece  
  
"FRY WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING!" shouted Leela.  
  
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH" screamed Fry startled.  
  
He shot back from the machine, banging his head on the skullcap and at the same time pulling the devices trigger  
  
There was blinding flash of light.  
  
Both Fry and Leela noticed that it seemed to come from behind their eyes.  
  
Time seemed to slow down and speed up at the same time.  
  
They felt themselves hit the floor in slow motion and at speed simultaneously.  
  
Fry opened his eyes.  
  
He was lying on the floor, a few feet from the machine.  
  
His head hurt. Badly  
  
His mind began to function again  
  
Leela! He thought, I heard her scream!  
  
He got up and looked around  
  
Leela lay crumpled next to the machine  
  
Fry rushed over to her  
  
"Leela? Leela are you ok?" he asked shaking her by the shoulder  
  
Her eye snapped open "Yes Fry, no thanks to you, you thundering moron, what did you do?"  
  
"Me?" said Fry "If you hadn't a scared the shit outta me than this wouldn't a happened!"  
  
"Oh really? Replied Leela, sternly, as she got up. "Why's that?"  
  
"You made me jump, I must a pushed a button or something, I guess" said Fry sheepishly. "Well at least nothing seems to be broken and your not hurt, Leela"  
  
"Apart from your brain" spat Leela angrily, trying to hide the fact she did play a part in the incident.  
  
"Come on lets get out of here before you do break something" said Leela "the machine looks ok, luckily for you"  
  
"Ok Ok" said Fry timidly before muttering "Its always my fault!" under his breath.  
  
They walked out of the professor's lab trying not to look guilty of anything, though in Fry's case he wished he were guilty of doing something else with Leela in the lab.  
  
"Fry, go and help Amy clean the underside of the table, you can't damage that" said Leela.  
  
"What did he break now!" asked Hermes apprehensively  
  
"Nothing" replied Fry and Leela simultaneously  
  
"I was just making sure he wasn't around anything he could break," said Leela  
  
She cringed as soon as she said it, knowing how useless it would make Fry feel.  
  
He did panic when I didn't get up she thought, He doesn't always think of himself first. And why do I feel so light-headed.  
  
The sensation passed  
  
Fry walked over to Amy, who handed him a hammer and a chisel. He too felt light-headed for an instant.  
  
"Try using a trash can for your gum in future, Fry " said Amy "Eeeeeeeeeewwww"  
  
Fry got under the table and started to chip away at the offending pieces of gum  
  
"Here Fry," said Amy "you might need these" she handed Fry a pair of protective goggles.  
  
"I don't need those Amy," said Fry " I'll just close my eyes".  
  
"Well if you're sure Fry," said Amy.  
  
Leela headed back over to the ship. A scream pierced the air a few seconds later.  
  
"OOOOOOWWWWWWW" yelled Fry "My thumb!"  
  
****************************************************************  
  
A couple of hours later found Fry still chipping away at a stubborn piece of gum, though he was now wearing the goggles.  
  
Amy was fixing herself something to eat in the kitchen area.  
  
Leela was discussing the details of the impending flight to Los Angeles with Hermes in his office.  
  
Amy was chewing her first mouthful of Martian style Cantonese Noodles when she heard a bang come from the direction of the meeting table.  
  
She looked over and saw Fry leaning heavily on the table, the hammer lying on the floor where it fell  
  
Fry's eye's where shut tight, a mask of pain in his face.  
  
Amy ran over to him.  
  
"Fry, what's wrong" She asked.  
  
"I Dunno" said Fry between strained gasps "My heads really killing me!"  
  
The door to Hermes's office flew open, the Rastafarian appeared in the doorway.  
  
"Someone come quickly something's wrong with Leela, she's fainted!" he shouted.  
  
Amy looked at Hermes and then back at Fry unsure of whom to help.  
  
Fry looked at her "Go! See if Leela's alright, I'll be fine" he said clutching his head.  
  
Amy ran over to Hermes.  
  
In his office she saw Leela lying crumpled on the floor. The young Cyclops was groaning softly.  
  
"What happened Hermes?" she asked  
  
"I don't know Amy she complained that her head was getting sore then she fainted!" said Hermes  
  
"Fry's head hurting him too" she answered.  
  
Hermes pressed a button on his office intercom "Zoidberg get your shell over here now!"  
  
*****************************************************************  
  
A few minutes later found Fry and Leela sat side by side on the bed in Zoidberg's office. Zoidberg, Hermes and Amy stood in front of them a concerned look on their faces  
  
"So what the diagnosis Dr Zoidberg?" Asked Amy  
  
"Vell, to be honest I don't have a clue" answered the lobster  
  
"Then what the hell do I employ you for?" yelled Hermes  
  
"Uh my astonishing good looks and my rapier vit?" answered Zoidberg  
  
Hermes glared at the crustacean.  
  
"Maybe its something they picked up on a delivery," said Amy  
  
"Oh you zink? Vhen did you become zee company doctor? How come zen Bender is Ok?" said Zoidberg  
  
"G,uh! Because he's a robot, genius!" said Amy  
  
"Look," said Leela "Maybe we've just been working to hard and need a rest?"  
  
"Well I can buy dat on your part Leela," said Hermes "though I'm not so sure about Fry"  
  
"Hey!" said Fry, before groaning and clutching his head again. "Uhhhhhh!"  
  
Leela too clutched her head.  
  
Fry looked up again "He's not that lazy!" He said, before shaking his head slightly, a puzzled look came over his face. "I mean… I'm not that lazy".  
  
He looked at Leela for a moment puzzled, but unsure of why.  
  
He noticed she was looking back at him equally puzzled.  
  
"Ok" said Hermes "You can both have the rest of the day off to go home and rest, but I want you back here tomorrow so the 'doctor' here can give you both a thorough medical examination"  
  
"Thank you Hermes," said Leela.  
  
"Yeah thanks," agreed Fry  
  
"Right lets get you two home," said Hermes "Its my bureaucratic duty to escort the more senior employee home so I'll help Leela, Amy you can take the wage slave home"  
  
Amy and Fry both glared at him but said nothing.  
  
  
  
The two groups left the PE building, Hermes helped Leela into his standard central bureaucracy department issue Ford Gemini, and Amy helped fry into her shiny new ThunderCougarFalconBird convertible.  
  
"Hey Amy" said Fry "When did you get the new car?"  
  
"After the insurance money came through from when Zoidberg crashed it," she answered subconsciously rubbing the small scar on her neck she got as an indirect result of the crash. "And my parents gave me some money for a new one as well!" she continued in a slightly more subdued tone.  
  
Fry groaned again as the pain in his head returned.  
  
At the same time in Hermes's car Leela felt her head begin to thump again.  
  
The journey to their respective apartments was a silent one, save for the occasional pain induced groan.  
  
*****************************************************************  
  
Amy and Fry arrived at Robot Arms Apartments. Amy parked in the garage below the building. She helped fry get out of the car and they walked over to the elevators.  
  
Fry saw a sign stuck on the elevator door.  
  
"Aw crap!" he said  
  
"What?" asked Amy Catching him up after locking her car.  
  
"The elevators out" said Fry we'll have to use the stairs"  
  
"Oh" said Amy " what floor is benders apartment on?"  
  
"The 1100101st"said Fry, casually  
  
"What!" yelled Amy.  
  
"Huh?" said Fry " Oh sorry that was in binary, I get that from living with bender I guess"  
  
"Phew!" said Amy "you had me worried there, what floor is it in decimal?"  
  
"Deciwhat?" asked Fry, bewildered.  
  
"Normal numbers said Amy annoyed.  
  
"The 101st" said Fry  
  
"Hum kah chan!" said Amy  
  
*************************************************************  
  
Leela and Hermes arrived at Leela's apartment block about half an hour later.  
  
"Mon! That was some three dimensional traffic jam," said Hermes getting out of he car  
  
"Yeah" said Leela through the pain in her head, as she opened the apartment block door. "You don't often see that theses days"  
  
"And that screen washer guy at the stop light, you think they'll be able to remove that squeegee?" said Hermes as he began climbing the three flights of stairs to apartment 1i.  
  
Yeah Hermes" said Leela in a moment of painlessness "they can surgically remove any thing nowadays"  
  
Leela unlocked her front door Hermes helped her in.  
  
****************************************************************  
  
About the same time at Robot Arms, two gasping figures appeared out of the stairwell on the 101st floor.  
  
"Poq Gai!" Said Amy "Thank god that's over"  
  
She looked at Fry. He hadn't looked that well to begin with, he looked even worse now, his face was bright red and sweating profusely, gasping for air and clutching the handrail to keep him upright.  
  
"Ho…Holy…Holy Shit! That's some climb!" he finally managed to spit out between gasping in lungfull's of air.  
  
"You got that right," said Amy who was also gasping for breath though not quite as hard as Fry.  
  
"Come on then Fry lets get you to bed" she continued, unlocking the door to benders apartment.  
  
"Yeah" said Fry weakly holding his head.  
  
***************************************************************  
  
Leela walked towards her bedroom as Hermes closed the front door behind him.  
  
She felt the pain in her head return as she took off her jacket; she went to steady herself against the wall.  
  
"You ok Leela?" asked Hermes.  
  
*****************************************************************  
  
Across town Fry too felt the pain return, he sat down on his bed, Amy took of his jacket, she noticed the grimace on his face.  
  
"It still hurts, huh?" she asked.  
  
"Mmm Hmmm" answered Fry through gritted teeth.  
  
"Come on then" she said softly. "Let's get you to bed" she began to pull Fry's shirt over his head.  
  
Fry felt the pain in his head increase he clenched his eyes in an effort to escape the pain.  
  
Fry's eyes flickered open. A look of confusion appeared on his face.  
  
****************************************************************  
  
Hermes, having received no answer to his question, moved over to Leela, concerned by her silence.  
  
She turned her head and looked at him.  
  
"Where am I" said Leela,  
  
"At home" answered Hermes.  
  
She looked at Hermes strangely. "Hey you're not Amy".  
  
There was a brief pause, before she spoke again.  
  
"Hey where's Amy."  
  
"Uh with Fry" responded Hermes, confused.  
  
Leela spoke again, "yeah she is, isn't she!"  
  
****************************************************************  
  
Across town at the same instant Fry Looked at Amy  
  
"Hey Amy how'd you get here?" He asked.  
  
"Well G'uh! I took you home."  
  
He stopped for a second, a blank look flashed across his face.  
  
"Yeah I know".  
  
Amy Looked at Fry.  
  
"Fry now you babbling worse than you usually do!" she said, helping him off with his jeans and into bed, tucking him in.  
  
"Try and get some sleep ok?" she cooed softly.  
  
"Ok" answered Fry closing his eyes, before drifting quickly off.  
  
****************************************************************  
  
Leela sat down on her bed, Hermes, folded up her jacket and put it away in her wardrobe.  
  
"I'll have Dr Zoidberg give you and fry a thorough medical exam tomorrow ok, just try and get some rest." Said Hermes as he closed the door to Leela's bedroom.  
  
"I will, Hermes, thanks," said Leela  
  
"No Problem." Said Hermes from the other side of the door.  
  
Leela heard her front door shut. She took off the rest of her clothing, took the scrunchie out of her hair and slipped in the welcoming embrace of her bed.  
  
She closed her eyes and felt the reassuring grip of sleep creep into her body.  
  
*****************************************************************  
  
Fry opened his eyes.  
  
Something didn't feel right to him. He soon figured out why.  
  
He was floating in his room a few inches from the ceiling.  
  
Fry instinctively made a grab for something to prevent him from falling.  
  
The only thing he found was the light fixing.  
  
Fry grabbed it and held on.  
  
Whoooooooa! He thought, Ok I ain't falling so I think I can let go of the light  
  
He looked at his hands grasping the fixing; he noticed he could see through them.  
  
Aww shit! I'm dead, he thought, I must a' had another soft drink induced heart attack!  
  
He turned his head and looked down at his bed.  
  
He got quite a shock when he saw his body was still lying in bed, breathing and apparently asleep.  
  
1.1 Whooo hooo! Ok so I'm not dead, I'm just having one of those out of body experience thingies.  
  
He let go of the light; he stayed where he was, floating next to the ceiling.  
  
"Coooooool!" he said, he noticed his voice seemed different, as though it had no physical presence and was merely an extension of his thoughts.  
  
"Wonder if I can move around," he said to himself quietly.  
  
Fry found that he could move around the room simply by thinking it.  
  
He glided around the apartment in the dark. He opened the door to Bender's room.  
  
Fry flew over Bender,  
  
"Hehehehe" chuckled Fry, to himself.  
  
"Whoooooooooooooooooooooooo," he wailed, "Bender! Bender! I, am a Ghost!"  
  
Bender didn't move, he simply turned round in his alcove and muttered to himself.  
  
"Nnnnnuhhhhhhh…Kill all humans"  
  
"Crud!" said Fry "He can't hear me"  
  
"Ah Screw this," said Fry I'm gonna see if I can fly outside"  
  
He moved over to the window. He was about to try and open it, when he had a thought.  
  
Hey if I'm out of my body then I should be able to go through the window.  
  
Fry moved closer to the window; he concentrated and slid forward.  
  
He felt himself move through the window, or rather felt the window move through him since it was still solid.  
  
Weeeeeiirrrrrd! Thought Fry.  
  
He looked down.  
  
"Jaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyssssssssuuuuuuuuuuuuuuss!"  
  
He suddenly remembered that benders apartment was on the 101st floor. The ground obscured by the dark of the night, far below.  
  
"Man, that's a long way down," said Fry  
  
An insane thought suddenly struck him.  
  
Fry set off towards the ground as fast as he could, screeching like a German Stuka bomber in a war movie. His arms outstretched like wings.  
  
The ground rapidly came into view.  
  
The specs of light growing into lampposts, road signs and car headlights.  
  
Fry pulled up at the last minute and swooped low over the traffic. No one saw him save for a stray cat that ran out into the road causing a passing car to swerve and collide with a trashcan.  
  
Fry soared skyward again.  
  
He flew on through the skyscrapers of New New York their windows glinting in the moonlight.  
  
The fact he was dressed only in a ghostly pair of light-speed briefs never crossed his mind once.  
  
****************************************************************  
  
Leela lay in her bed, sleeping. She stirred and opened her eyes.  
  
The ache in her head had gone. Her bedroom felt hot and airless. She got up to open her recently installed window.  
  
Something was wrong with the situation, but she couldn't place what it was. Suddenly the realisation hit her. She had not thrown back her bedclothes yet she could not recall them hindering her exit from the bed.  
  
She thought about this puzzled for a moment before putting it down to her being too tired to remember.  
  
She passed by the mirror on her wardrobe door and she froze.  
  
Her reflection wasn't there.  
  
She spun around and looked back at her bed.  
  
The sleeping form of her body still lay there, snoring quietly.  
  
"OH MY GOD" she yelled, the strange tone of her voice, shocking her into silence again.  
  
I'm out of my body, she thought, it must have something to do with the professors machine.  
  
Oh no! This is probably happening to Fry too! She thought. I have to go and see if he's alright!  
  
She walked over to her body where it lay in her bed.  
  
She got on her bed and lay down back in her body.  
  
She felt no noticeable difference.  
  
"OK, Here goes!" she said,  
  
Leela got up again making a conscious effort to pull back the bed sheets. She saw her hands appear ghostlike through the sheets as she tried in vain to grasp the bedclothes.  
  
"Damnit!" said Leela  
  
Ok then I'll just have to go like this.  
  
She looked down at her naked, and now transparent, body.  
  
Why did this have to happen when all my PJ's are in the wash! She groaned. Well if I can't see myself in the mirror then hopefully no one else can.  
  
She walked over to her front door. She was about to try the handle when she saw her hand slip through the door, unhindered.  
  
Leela cautiously walked through the door looking around out side in case there was someone around.  
  
I know they can't see me but I still don't want to be naked in front of just any one, she thought  
  
She carefully walked done the stairs and out on to the street.  
  
She'd gone a few paces when two people came out of the bar on the corner of her block.  
  
It was a guy and a girl about her age.  
  
Leela froze for a second, and covered her breasts and crotch with her arms and scurried into a doorway.  
  
They walked past oblivious to her.  
  
She crept out of the doorway, and resumed walking to Fry and Benders apartment.  
  
She walked past the bar; not noticing the middle aged man exiting it until it was too late.  
  
Leela was suddenly confronted with the man walking straight towards her, there was nowhere to run, he was too close, she opened her mouth to say something when he walked straight through her.  
  
She stood there rooted to the spot.  
  
OK, she thought, so people can't see me.  
  
Leela regained her composure and set of again towards Fry's apartment.  
  
***************************************************************  
  
Fry was flying through the streets of New New York at a much lower lever than before. He was now flying between the buildings rather than above them. Occasionally he flew through one trying in vain to frighten any one unlucky enough to have the ability to see him.  
  
He felt himself shiver,  
  
How can I feel cold when I don't even have a real body, he thought to himself, ah well I suppose I better get back  
  
Fry began to turn himself around when he suddenly felt something unseen, pull him onwards.  
  
"Wha…! Hey I can't turn round. I must be caught in a tractor beam or something," said Fry  
  
He suddenly remembered where he was "And who the hell am I talking to?"  
  
Wonder where it's taking me? He thought, Hey! Leela lives around here.  
  
Fry glanced at the street below him; a brief flash of purple hair in the moonlight caused him to look again.  
  
"Hey Leela! He shouted, before he registered that she was in fact naked,  
  
Man, I wish I could see that again, he thought, but closer, and in my body… and in her bedroom  
  
**************************************************************  
  
Leela heard Fry's cry and glanced upwards at the source, She gasped,  
  
"Oh my god it's Fry!" She said "he's flying and he's only wearing a pair of light-speed briefs… he could catch a chill up there!"  
  
Wait! I could see through him, she thought recalling the sight of stars through Fry's body, the same thing must have happened to him. So if he can fly then I should be able to do it t…  
  
She never got a chance to finish her line of thought.  
  
Leela felt herself being pulled of her feet. She felt her self-rising through the air the flow of air chilling her body as it rushed past, whistling in her ears.  
  
She didn't notice the whistling she was too busy screaming.  
  
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!"  
  
Leela looked down and saw the streetlights of New New York passing by, below her  
  
She looked to see where she was heading, her eye watering in the wind, she could barely make out the buildings she passed, she had to keep wiping away the tears from her eye.  
  
In the distance she could make out the shape of a large, tall, building. The shape of it seemed quite familiar.  
  
I think that's Robot Arms, she though to herself, though I can't be sure, I've never seen it from this perspective. If I 'm heading there, then where is Fry going?  
  
Leela thought about this for a split second, "Oh my!" she exclaimed.  
  
  
  
Fry sped on through the sky moments after glimpsing Leela. He wasn't that concerned about where he was going and what was happening to him, his mind was still dwelling on the sight that had graced his eyes an few seconds ago,  
  
It was Leela and she was naked, he thought, she was naked… out on the street, NAKED!  
  
He couldn't help thinking about how vulnerable and fragile she looked; it was strange how seeing someone naked could change your perception of them.  
  
"I hope she's all right," said Fry, glancing back over his shoulder.  
  
He cast his gaze forward again, just in time to see the wall of Leela's apartment inches from his face.  
  
"AAAAAAA…"  
  
  
  
Leela could clearly see Robot Arms Apartments, looming large in her field of vision.  
  
She felt herself slow a little, she saw she was heading for one window in particular, she knew automatically whose apartment it was, she felt herself go through the window and enter the building, she flew through the rooms of the apartment, stopping in one in particular.  
  
She could make out the sleeping form of Fry below her.  
  
Leela felt herself moving closer to Fry's body.  
  
"Well at least he's still breathing," she thought,  
  
Suddenly she felt herself enter Fry's body, she couldn't move, she couldn't resist, she was helpless.  
  
**************************************************************  
  
Hermes arrived back at the Planet Express Headquarters, and then watched as Amy attempted to parallel park her car, behind his and in front of some poor innocent driver's car, only just missing both car's bumpers.  
  
"I see, you've improved your parking technique Amy", observed Hermes.  
  
"Well B'uh, I missed them both, didn't I", answered Amy as she stormed into the building.  
  
"Amy, you go and get the ship prepared, you're temporary Pilot for the trip to LA, as Leela is unfit". Shouted Hermes after her.  
  
"OK, I'll go and get changed and meet you there", came the now distant response.  
  
"Get changed, what on earth for", muttered a surprised Hermes, as he turned towards the Professor's Laboratory.  
  
On his way, he passed the delivery slot, where he noticed a package had been left, with TOP SECRET stamped all over it. He took the paper work, and dropped it onto his desk, leaving a memo to read it on his return, then carried on towards the Laboratory.  
  
  
  
"You infernal machine, stop beeping", yelled the Professor at the ST Device.  
  
"What's Up?", asked Hermes as he entered.  
  
"This invention, keeps telling me it's been used, although I only just finished it.", replied Farnsworth.  
  
"Let me see it", as Hermes reached his hand out, and took the device from Farnsworth.  
  
"Well, if I what seeing is right, it is registering as two DNA patterns recorded.", answered Hermes.  
  
"It must be faulty, like all my inventions, anyhoo, pack it into that case" instructed the Professor.  
  
"Are you ready to go now, we've got a strict schedule to keep" asked Hermes.  
  
"Uh Yeah", replied the Professor  
  
"Let's go already", said Hermes as he grabbed the case containing the ST Device, and headed for the door, looking behind to make certain the Professor was actually following him.  
  
They arrived at the stairs leading up to the ship, looking around there was no apparent sign of Amy anywhere.  
  
"Where's Amy, she's meant to be here as Pilot", remarked Hermes  
  
"Amy's pilot? where's Leela?", asked the Professor  
  
"You old coot, we took her and Fry home ill earlier, don't you remember", asked an exasperated Hermes.  
  
"Uh, No", came the response.  
  
"AAAMMMMYYYYYY, get your ass out here!", yelled Hermes at the top of his voice.  
  
"I'm here, and there's no need to shout", came Amy's voice from within the ship.  
  
"Oh right, sorry", replied Hermes, as he and the Professor started up the stairs.  
  
As they entered the Flight, they were greeted by the sight of Amy wearing a full-length low-backed cerise dress, with a strategically placed bow across the top of her chest, on her feet wear pair of high heeled shoes.  
  
"What do you think, good enough for the convention?", asked Amy.  
  
"Holy Lion of Zion, you're going to pilot us, wearing that", demanded Hermes.  
  
"Yeah, why is there something wrong?", she answered in a slightly putout manner.  
  
"Amy, we're only going to LA, to drop the Professor off and then come back here, we've got a Top Secret delivery to make on our return", he answered.  
  
"You want me to make a delivery as well?", she queried.  
  
"No, It's going to take us at least 7 hours to get there and back, so hopefully, Leela will have recovered by then", he responded.  
  
"Oh, so I got made up for nothing", came the upset sounding response.  
  
"Yep, now let's get on our way to LA.", ordered Hermes.  
  
"Hum kah chan!", replied Amy as she sat in the Pilot's chair.  
  
She turned the key to start the engines and waited until the familiar vibration started to shake the ship, after pressing a couple more buttons, the ship rose to a 45-degree angle, and then she pushed the throttle forward, and they sped away from the Planet Express Building.  
  
Amy then typed the destination co-ordinates into the Autopilot, pressed the start button, and then headed off to get changed back into her familiar pink shell suit.  
  
****************************************************************  
  
"Well this is one weird dream, imagine me being involved in a body swap, and with Fry of all people. I wonder if this has anything to do with the accident that occurred when I caught him playing with the Professor's LUNATIC device", was the last conscious thought that passed through her mind, before sleep took control.  
  
After what seemed like only a few minutes, she awoke and slowly looked around the bedroom.  
  
"What the... I'm in Fry's bedroom! Maybe that wasn't a strange dream I had last night"; she uttered aloud, as she noticed that her fringe of purple hair was missing.  
  
She instantly felt around her face and found two round eyes, instead of one large oval eye.  
  
"This can't be!" she muttered to herself in shock, as she pushed back the sheet covering her body and noticed that she was now wearing Lightspeed Briefs and had a severely under exercised and most importantly, male, body.  
  
"AAAAAAAAAHHH!" she screamed uncontrollably.  
  
"Oh my god, oh my GOD, oh my god." She thought in panic, "OK, Turanga, this isn't what it seems; I couldn't possibly be in Fry's body? Could I? "  
  
"I wonder if in among all this junk strewn all over the room, Fry has a mirror", she said to herself, noticing for the first time that she sounded like Fry.  
  
She started to hunt through the crap on Fry's floor in search of a mirror. After moving Fry's regular clothing off the top of the pile to one side, the first item that she came across was his Holophonr Book, which looked like it was well used, "He's still practising, that's good" wistfully thought Leela.  
  
After throwing some empty Slurm Cans in the direction of what looked like a Waste Basket, she came across a scrunched up piece of paper, after untangling it, she saw a very badly drawn picture of what looked like her and Fry holding hands. "It looks like Fry is still in Love with me, despite all that I've done to him recently" whispered Leela remorsefully.  
  
After throwing a heavily Slurm stained white T-shirt to one side, she discovered a pair of her panties. "What the hell, does Fry want with these? And where did he get them from?" she exclaimed astonished and infuriated.  
  
"I'd better take them back, and confront Fry after all this over as to why he had them" she hissed.  
  
"OK, no sign of a mirror on the floor, I'll have to have a look around the room", she thought.  
  
After inspecting the contents of Fry's desk and table, she looked around the walls and noticed just above the bed that there was a greyish rectangular outline of where something should have been hanging on the wall.  
  
"Hmm, looks like behind the bed is my last chance of finding one", she thought.  
  
After moving the bed away from the wall, she found the mirror; and stared in disbelief at Fry's Face staring back at her.  
  
"Oh My God, it's actually happened, where is Fry" she exclaimed aghast  
  
The realisation hit home, the dream of Fry flying over New New York, and her being sucked towards his apartment, was real.  
  
"Oh No, If I'm in his body, then he must be in mine." She cried out aloud.  
  
The door to Fry's room opened and in walked Bender.  
  
"Morning skintube" said Bender "You alright? I heard some screaming n stuff?"  
  
"Bender, do you mind I'm half-naked" screamed a still dazed Leela, as she instinctively covered her covered her breasts with her right arm, and her crotch with her left hand.  
  
"Well Fry, it's not as if I ain't seen you undressed before, so why are you freaking out so much?" retorted Bender  
  
"Uh, sorry Bender but I had such a weird dream last night about me being Leela" She responded  
  
"OK Fry, I'm not that interested, its just that your crashing around was worse than normal" answered Bender  
  
"Sorry, I'm not myself, but I think the dream affected me more than I thought," answered Leela/Fry honestly  
  
Bender then turned around and walked out the door muttering quietly "Screwball!"  
  
"Phew, that was close and I've got to remember that I'm Fry" she sighed when the door closed again  
  
Do I keep acting like Fry? Or do I tell someone what's happened? She thought. It's probably best if I speak to Fry first before I decide.  
  
I'd better go and find him before he gets to work, She decided mentally, so we can work out how this happened and what we should do next?  
  
"I'd better get dressed, as I can't walk around the streets like this, people will really see me this time", she said to herself, as she bent down and started to pull on Fry's jeans.  
  
After throwing on the rest of his clothes, she bent down and picked up her panties and pocketed them inside the jacket.  
  
I'd better get a move on, there's no telling what sort of trouble Fry could be having in my apartment, she thought, as she rushed out of the bedroom and the front door.  
  
"Freakin' humans! Always rushin' everywhere, not like us Robots, well some Robots, well me", muttered Bender.  
  
***************************************************************  
  
Fry felt himself awaken, he reached up and rubbed the sleep out of his eyes, his brain was telling him that something was wrong, his nose felt lower down than it usually did.  
  
Fry dismissed this as an after effect of the stale pizza he'd found under his bed, he didn't recall eating it but he'd had weird dreams after doing this before, he glanced at the ceiling and immediately noticed that a tuft of hair partially obscured his view.  
  
Purple hair.  
  
He looked around him for Leela hoping he'd gotten lucky and just couldn't remember it.  
  
He was alone in the bed.  
  
The events of the night before came flooding back to him  
  
His hands flew up to his face.  
  
What he felt confirmed his suspicions  
  
"Coooooooooooooooooooooool" said Fry, blinking and looking at his hands. The skin was smoother and the hands were definitely feminine  
  
He soon discovered that however hard he tried he could not go cockeyed with only one eye.  
  
He stopped suddenly as a though struck him.  
  
Fry gingerly lifted up the blanket and gazed at the sight below.  
  
OH MY GOD! Exclaimed fry, I'M IN LEELA'S BODY,  
  
He clasped the blankets against him again.  
  
He remained like this for a few seconds before taking a look under the covers again.  
  
"Oh my god!" he exclaimed again, in a softer voice.  
  
A number of thoughts struck him at once, Only one of which Leela would have approved of.  
  
Acting on this he got up and wrapped the bedclothes around his or rather her body,  
  
He saw some movement out of the corner of his eye; he looked and found himself staring at Leela, or rather at the reflection of himself in her body in the full-length mirror on the door of the closet.  
  
Whoa, thought Fry, this is too weird,  
  
He moved his arm around watching the reflection do the same, trying to confirm that this situation, however bizarre it seemed, was actually happening.  
  
He noticed that even first thing in the morning and with her hair down and unkempt, Leela was still the prettiest girl he knew.  
  
He reached for the door to Leela's closet and missed it by a few inches. He tried a few more times before finally managing to grab hold of the handle  
  
"Damn it!" Said fry, half in realisation, half in frustration "Guess this must be that depth perception thing Leela goes on about.  
  
Fry searched through Leela's closet until he found a bathrobe, which he quickly put on trying not to stare at her naked body.  
  
This is stupid he thought, she couldn't know what I've been doing here, in her body, I could do anything I want…Yeah, but then I'd have to look her in the eye, every time I see her.  
  
He looked at the reflection in the mirror, and sighed.  
  
He went to move when mischievous though crossed his mind  
  
He stepped back in front of the mirror slipped the robe off his shoulders and gave a little wiggle, before giggling and tying the robe shut tightly and walking out of the bedroom.  
  
Fry walked around Leela's apartment; it was still just as bare as he remembered it, apart from the recently installed window.  
  
He looked out of the new window; there was a brick wall a few feet from it.  
  
Nice view, he thought, sarcastically, man, am I hungry.  
  
Fry began searching the cupboards for something to eat each one he open was bare, until finally he opened the last cupboard. On the upper shelf there were a few tins of assorted foods and an open box of Archduke Chocula cereal.  
  
On the lower shelf Fry saw some crockery and cutlery,  
  
On closer examination Fry saw that there was one plate, one cup, one saucer, a soup bowl, a knife, a fork and a single spoon.  
  
"Oh Leela!" he said softly, the full extent of her lonely life hitting him.  
  
Fry took out the one plate in the cupboard and was about to place it on the worktop when he felt the room begin to spin around him.  
  
Whoa!" he exclaimed, reaching for the counter.  
  
His hand never got there. His new depth perception was seriously affecting his ability to stay up right.  
  
The room closed in around him.  
  
Fry hit the ground with a thud, the plate smashing next to him,  
  
He didn't feel himself hit the ground; his mind was already elsewhere.  
  
  
  
Fry opened his eyes, or eye, or what ever the hell he had now; he was still getting used to it,  
  
There were sparkling lights everywhere, the room was darkened, and he could make out people moving around, dancing,  
  
He looked down at himself or rather at Leela's body.  
  
He sighed,  
  
Still here huh? He thought, and why the hell am I wearing a dress made from old pieces of carpet?  
  
And why am I standing here with my arm out like I'm holding someone but there's no one there,  
  
He began to make out a low sound, gradually he realised it was a chant,  
  
"One eye! One eye! One eye! One eye!"  
  
His eyes got used to the darkness surrounding the stage, he could see the crowd around the stage pointing and staring at him.  
  
Fry recognised one face in the crowd in particular; the average brown dinner suit was the give away.  
  
Adalai.  
  
He had his arm round an average looking brunette who was giggling and smirking at Leela  
  
He heard Adalai shout the words "I only asked you to the prom for a dare!" at him  
  
I'm at Leela's High School Prom, he thought, this must be a memory of hers. Boy and I though my prom night was a disaster, those bastards. That Bastard! What did she ever do to deserve this?  
  
A voice from the crowd yelled out. Get that freaky bitch off the stage she's putting me off my food.  
  
Suddenly a flash bulb went off in front of him; he felt himself stumble off the stage, blinded by the flash, tripping over a chair in the process of fleeing and landing in a crumpled heap to the sound of raucous laughter from the crowd.  
  
As he lay there, Fry felt the feeling of absolute humiliation fill his entire body, as it was wracked with sobs.  
  
He felt himself detach from this reality and the darkness returned to his vision,  
  
Slowly another reality began to filter in, one where he was being shaken, one where some one was calling his name, where his own voice was calling his name.  
  
  
  
Leela saw Fry's eye, her eye, snap open.  
  
He stared at her for a few seconds, a bewildered look on his face, her face.  
  
This is SOOOOO weird, thought Leela/Fry, as she looked down at him.  
  
The look changed to one of relief as Fry/Leela realised who it was.  
  
"Le?Leela? Is? Is that you?" he asked in her voice.  
  
"Yes Fry it's me? I think? I'm not you anyway! What happened too you?" she asked  
  
"I dunno", he replied "I think I blacked out, I think? I think I just saw a memory of yours, I was at your prom night! In your body!"  
  
"Your delirious Fry!" said Leela/Fry "You just bumped your head"  
  
"It seemed so real though!" he replied as he got up unsteadily.  
  
"Whoa!" He exclaimed, "I feel kinda woozy"  
  
"Yeah! Well too bad" said Leela/Fry, we gotta get to work and figure out what happened, which means you got to get dressed."  
  
"Yeah I guess," said Fry/Leela  
  
"But after you've had a shower!" said Leela/Fry throwing a towel at him.  
  
"Cooooooool!" said Fry/Leela, smirking.  
  
Leela/Fry opened her mouth to chastise him for this comment when she caught the strange look on his face, that in his own body would have been a playful wink indicating that he was joking, but in her body it came out a kind of lopsided grin and squint.  
  
She actually found it hard to stop herself from laughing at it.  
  
She watched Fry/Leela bend over to pick up the towel and miss it by inches.  
  
He tried again, and failed.  
  
He looked at her with her single eye.  
  
"Um a little help here?" said Fry/Leela "I still gotta get used to this depth perception thingy"  
  
Fry/Leela bent down in one last attempt to reach the towel, unaware that Leela/Fry was doing the same, their heads clashed with a dull thud.  
  
"Ouch!" cried Leela/Fry "Fry! Watch what you're doing!" She glared at him for a minute.  
  
Fry/Leela noticed how weird it was being scowled at by yourself.  
  
Wow, he thought so that's how I look mad! Boy am I cute!  
  
Leela/Fry picked up the towel and handed it to Fry/Leela  
  
"Thanks" he replied sheepishly, before turning round and walking into a door.  
  
"OWWW!" yelled Fry/Leela  
  
Leela/Fry winced  
  
"Careful Fry that's my body you're in," she said slightly concerned  
  
"Yeah and this is your head that's hurting now, this is really beginning to bug me, its ok for you, your used to it said Fry/Leela, "hey how's it feel to have two eyes for a change?" he went on.  
  
Kinda weird" said Leela/Fry going crossed eyed, she'd been doing this a lot since she discovered it was possible.  
  
She glanced at the clock on the wall.  
  
"C'mon Fry you gotta get ready or we're going to be late," said Leela/Fry.  
  
"Yeah yeah!" replied fry going into the bathroom,  
  
Leela/Fry shoved Fry/Leela towards the bathroom.  
  
"A girl has to look her best you know!" she said as Fry/Leela went into the bathroom.  
  
He closed the door behind him and leaned up against it  
  
Oh god he thought I've been dreading this bit, what am I going to do.  
  
Simple! came the answer, you're gonna get undressed, get in the shower and soap up Leela's hot, wet steamy naked body….  
  
His mind trailed off on a tangent of its own.  
  
SLAP! his hand flew up to his face, leaving a stinging red mark,  
  
Quit it! Said his conscience, sounding strangely like Leela, we don't have time for this now…maybe later, it went on.  
  
"Okay Philip, here's what we're gonna do." Said Fry/Leela to himself, "First your gonna turn the shower on and set it to cold, then your gonna get out of the robe and step into the shower, then your gonna wash yourself, get out and dry your self off. Ok?" he asked  
  
OK! Said Fry/Leela to himself.  
  
  
  
Leela/Fry was tiding up the broken plate in the kitchen when she heard herself or rather Fry in her body, scream  
  
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAh!  
  
She ran to the bathroom door, and knocked on it.  
  
Fry are you ok? She asked  
  
"Ye, ye, ye, yeah, I'm fi, fi, fine the waters ju, ju, just a little c, c, cold that's all," he replied  
  
"Well why don't you turn up the heat then?" replied Leela/Fry  
  
"Nah, I don't think that's a good Idea!" said Fry  
  
"Why's that?" Asked Leela, just before she realised why Fry would be taking a cold shower in her body  
  
Jeeze! Turanga, you can be really dumb sometimes she thought.  
  
"Never mind!" she said, through the bathroom door.  
  
Fry's screams went on for a few more minutes before Leela heard the shower stop, and Fry/Leela came out,  
  
He started to towel dry his hair, as he walked back to the bedroom to get dressed. Leela/Fry looked on with an almost shocked look on her face.  
  
"No! No! No! Fry, use the hair dryer, you'll make it all frizzy, she said her voice slightly raised,  
  
Fry/Leela looked at her with a slightly bemused look.  
  
"Ok where's your hair dryer then," said Fry/Leela looking around him? Rooting through stuff. He suddenly stumbled across her underwear drawer.  
  
"OOOOOHH MMMYYYYY GOD!" said Fry, observing the collection of flimsy and skimpy undergarments that was far larger than the one in the PE ship.  
  
"Oh My God, It's the Mother Lode...I've died and gone to heaven," said Fry in a low voice,  
  
There was a quiet cough behind him, the kind that people make when they want you to know that they're there.  
  
He spun round; Leela/Fry was standing behind him, casually holding a hairdryer.  
  
"Ohh, uh… hey!" said Fry/Leela sheepishly, I see you found a hair dryer then.  
  
"You've never put your hair in a pony tail have you Fry?" asked Leela/Fry  
  
"Uh no I haven't now you mention it!" He replied.  
  
"Ok then come over here to the dresser and sit down" said Leela/Fry  
  
Fry/Leela want over to the dresser and sat down. He felt Leela/Fry take hold of his or her hair, he still couldn't figure out which.  
  
Leela/Fry took hold of her hairbrush and moved Fry/Leela's head to one side; she noticed a small and very faint shiver run through Fry as she touched him.  
  
She bought the brush roughly down though the hair.  
  
Careful now Turanga you don't want to do any lasting damage it is still your head, she thought, just enough pain to teach him not to rifle my panties drawer.  
  
Fry/Leela grunted a few times as she brushed his hair, the bristles scraping against the scalp now and then.  
  
She put the brush down and picked up one of the scrunchies sitting on the dresser, then she gathered up Fry/Leela's hair and put it in to the scrunchie, then with one hand she held the scrunchie while pulling the ponytail tight with the other hand  
  
Fry/Leela squealed in pain.  
  
YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWW! He shrieked.  
  
"Jeeze! Leela be careful there," he yelled, getting out of the chair.  
  
"Ok its done," he said, now if you don't mind I'd like to get dressed, I know how to put on a bra, remember I was attached to Amy for a while.  
  
"Fry its nothing I ain't seen thousands of times before!" Began Leela/Fry before she heard her stomach rumble.  
  
"Ok Fry you get dressed while I get something to eat", she said as she left the room, as she closed the door she glanced back at Fry/Leela.  
  
He was rubbing the back of his neck, at the hairline. She saw that the skin was red and inflamed where the scrunchie had pulled at it.  
  
She started to feel slightly guilty about it as she fixed herself some Archduke Chocula.  
  
Well he did need to be taught a lesson but perhaps I went a bit too far, she thought, that mark on his, My neck did look kinda sore.  
  
  
  
Fry loosened the scrunchie a little.  
  
Damn that girls got some strength in her, He thought, Wait that's my body she's in, I'm in hers. Jeeze Phil, how could you forget a thing like that with these in front of you.  
  
Fry/Leela looked down at the ample bosom a few inches below his nose.  
  
"Ah well I suppose I better start to get dressed and take this robe off," he said with a slight grin,  
  
Fry/Leela slipped the robe off and went back to the underwear drawer; he picked up a matching set of plain white bra and panties.  
  
"Ok I think these should be plain enough to keep her happy" said Fry as he started to get dressed.  
  
This sucks soo much, I finally get to be with Leela naked, kinda, he thought, and I'm putting clothes ON her.  
  
He pulled on the panties and clasped the bra closed behind his back; Fry/Leela admired the result in the mirror  
  
Another thought struck him.  
  
Fry/Leela ran through a series of pose's he'd seen super models use.  
  
"Coool! Just like one of those Super Models, except Leela's better looking", he chuckled to himself.  
  
Fry/Leela hadn't heard the door open a few second's earlier  
  
"Fry, just what the hell are you doing?", yelled Leela/Fry angrily  
  
"Uh, errr, nothing", came the surprised and embarrassed reply.  
  
"I leave you alone for 2 minutes and look what happens, here catch these and put them on", bellowed Leela/Fry.  
  
Leela/Fry picked up the clean clothes she'd laid out on her bedside cabinet the night before and threw then at Fry/Leela.  
  
Ha! Missed! Said Fry/Leela, seconds before being hit in the face by Leela's boots.  
  
He picked himself off the floor and picked up the boots, he gave a cautionary sniff at them.  
  
"Jeeze!" Exclaimed Fry/Leela "Leela ain't you ever heard of odour eaters, man, talk about boot feet!"  
  
"Shut Up! Fry!" retorted Leela/Fry, "and get dressed"  
  
****************************************************************  
  
Thirty minutes later saw the pair arrive outside the PE building.  
  
"Ok!" said Leela/Fry "You go in first and then I'll go in five minutes later!"  
  
"Alright" said Fry/Leela, " but why?"  
  
"Because it would look strange us both going into work together, at the same time," answered Leela/Fry  
  
"You mean you wouldn't want any one thinking that there was anything going on between us, right?" snapped Fry/Leela.  
  
"Uhh…" began Leela/Fry.  
  
"Hey its fine!" said Fry/Leela stiffly "I know I'm an embarrassment!"  
  
Fry/Leela stormed off toward the Planet Express building.  
  
****************************************************************  
  
The doors of the Planet Express building flew open as Fry/Leela stormed through them, the bang as they halted suddenly when they hit their stops, echoing through the empty building. The doors having unlocked automatically at 8 am.  
  
"Damn it!" Spat, Fry with a mix of anger, angst and frustration.  
  
Why does she always have to be so self-righteous, and uptight? He thought.  
  
He kept hoping she'd follow him through the doors, she didn't.  
  
He walked through the building to the employee lounge.  
  
Fry/Leela sat down in silence; he didn't even feel like turning on the TV. He gazed out the window, the rising sun bathing New New York in its warm light.  
  
He watched the shadows diminish as the sun climbed higher into the sky. He thought of Leela walking around out there in his body.  
  
He looked down at his hands, her hands, they weren't at all like his, on his body, Leela's hands were smaller than his, thinner across, the skin was smoother, there were a few small feint scars on her knuckles, from the numerous noses she had broken.  
  
Her hands kinda some her up, he thought, tough, but fragile.  
  
Fry/Leela felt himself chuckle slightly, his anger abating,  
  
I can never stay mad at her for long, he thought. She's too damn cute… Wait does that mean that I think I'm cute, cos she's in my body or what?  
  
Fry pondered this for a few moments, his brain  
  
Wow! Thought Fry/Leela I really do like her for her mind and not just her body.  
  
Fry/Leela looked down, Her fantastically well-proportioned body, he thought.  
  
He looked up when he heard someone else come through the doors.  
  
He gave a slight sigh when he saw it was Hermes and not Leela/Fry.  
  
"Morning Hermes", he said, "Guess your kinda shocked that I'm here so early huh?"  
  
"Why's that?" said Hermes, "your always at work early Leela, its just that your not usually in the lounge. You feeling ok today?"  
  
"Uh yeah! I'm Leela alright, uh...eh...I mean, eh… yeah I'm alright" said Fry/Leela remembering the situation.  
  
"Um yes you are!" said Hermes slightly confused. Before walking out of the lounge.  
  
"Don't forget the annual personnel medical today either, Leela," said Hermes from outside.  
  
Jeeeze thought Fry/Leela. I gotta remember who I am.  
  
Ok, where would Leela be right now? He thought, Checking the ship, you idiot, where else?  
  
Fry/Leela got up and made his way down to the hanger.  
  
The ship was sitting in its landing area, steam forming around its liquid nitrogen/oxygen atmosphere refilling pipes.  
  
Amy was standing next to the refuelling station monitoring the ship's atmosphere, coolant and fuel levels.  
  
Amy turned around when she heard someone approaching.  
  
"Hi Leela!" said Amy, "See, you're looking like yourself again, still got the same boots though"  
  
"Hi Amy, yeah they're nice aren't they" said Fry/Leela oblivious to the sarcasm in Amy's voice  
  
"Uh, eh yeahhhh! Said Amy, uncertainly, eyeing Fry/Leela strangely.  
  
"So how are you Amy?" Asked Fry /Leela.  
  
"I'm fine Leela," said Amy, who was now beginning to suspect Leela was up to something.  
  
"Uh ok, coool!" said Fry/Leela.  
  
Damn thought Fry/Leela, Leela never say's cool.  
  
I need to get out of this situation fast he thought.  
  
"Well ok I'm gonna sit over at the meeting table for a bit, now", said Fry/Leela.  
  
"Uh don't you wanna take over refuelling the ship, Leela?" asked Amy  
  
"No thanks Amy, it looks like you can handle the situation." Said Fry/Leela, practically running away now.  
  
Jeeze! That was close, he thought to himself. Me, refuelling the ship? Now that's scary,  
  
Mental images of mushroom clouds and explosions filled his head,  
  
Yep he thought as he sat down at the meeting table. Leela would love that, me burning the place down.  
  
1.2 ****************************************************************  
  
"Ouch!" winced Leela/Fry as she watched Fry/Leela storm nose first straight into the Planet Express doors.  
  
"Goddamnit, stupid depth perception", he yelled, before grabbing the door handles pulling them back violently and marching in.  
  
"Well, Turanga, that could have gone a bit better", she thought to herself as she wandered aimlessly down the street.  
  
"If only he wasn't so immature most of the time, then these disagreements wouldn't happen" she spoke loudly to herself, while diverting her eyes away from passers-by that were looking at her like she was going mad.  
  
She heard the sound of a familiar space ship engine overhead.  
  
Leela/Fry looked up aghast, as the Planet Express ship, flew past, and headed towards the building.  
  
"Oh my life, I'd totally forgotten about the Professor and his convention, I wonder who's piloting the ship" she uttered to herself.  
  
She watched with some concern, as the ship drew to a halt over the top of the building and hovered there while the door slid seamlessly back, and then dropped nice and gently into its landing bay.  
  
"If that was Amy piloting the ship, then I'll have to check that everything is where it should be, the last time, it took me 3 hours to locate the Engine Manual" contemplated Leela/Fry.  
  
"I'll just pop into Bleichman's Bookstore, to wile away a few more minutes," said Leela/Fry to herself as she was passing the store.  
  
As she walked into the bookstore, and started browse through several Video- Novels, the proprietor wandered over carrying a couple of magazines.  
  
"Mr. Fry, so good to see you again, your standing order for "Alien Babes – Lust And Leisure" and "Cosmicpolitan" have arrived, would you like to pay now or later" he asked with a mischievous look on his face.  
  
"I... I ordered these" came the response, from a clearly confused Lela/Fry.  
  
"Yeah, about 2 weeks ago" he responded as he handed them over. Leela/Fry promptly placed them in the inside pocket of his jacket.  
  
"Ahh, good idea, so Miss Leela can't see the evidence" chuckled Mr. Bleichman.  
  
"Uh, yeah, that's the plan" uncertainly replied Leela/Fry, as he turned to leave the shop.  
  
"So, you're still infatuated with her, I can't understand why, one eyed, big nosed, purple haired for goodness sake" he asked.  
  
Before Bleichman had the chance to register what was happening, Leela/Fry raised his hand and slapped him straight across the left cheek.  
  
"Don't you ever say that about me... err her ever again" shouted Leela/Fry.  
  
"OK OK, but that show of violence was uncalled for" came the shocked reply  
  
"Let that be a lesson, never insult a woman" responded Leela/Fry, as he opened the doors and started to walk out.  
  
"Just one thing before you go, can you tell the lovely Amy Wong, that I'll meet her at "The Hip Joint" this Saturday" Mr. Bleichman added as an after thought, while rubbing his cheek.  
  
As Leela/Fry exited the building, she swore she heard "mmmmm Pink Sweatsuit", but wasn't certain.  
  
"When I get back to the office, someone is gonna pay for this!" she stated as she started purposefully in the direction of the office.  
  
After a couple of minutes, she arrived at the main Planet Express doors, very nearly ripped the left one off it's hinges, and headed straight for the conference area.  
  
"Alright, give da man a hand, he's only 15 minutes late today" mockingly applauded Hermes, as Leela/Fry raged towards the conference table.  
  
"Not Today Hermes, I'm not in the mood for your frivolity" came the fiery response, as she shoved Hermes out the way.  
  
"Mon, what's got you so mad?" asked Hermes as he steadied himself against a chair.  
  
"Yeah Fry, this isn't like you at all" queried Amy.  
  
"Amy, you keep your nose, what bit of one you have, out of this" came the angry response.  
  
"Ai ye, hey that wasn't nice Fry, and not like you at all" came Amy's hurt response.  
  
"Yeah, remember who you are!" Fry/Leela said  
  
After hearing Fry/Leela, attempting to placate her feelings, Leela/Fry pulled out a chair and sat down with a resigned thud, both elbows simultaneously hitting the table, as her head fell into her hands, as she felt her anger start to dissipate.  
  
"I'm sorry everyone, it's just that someone insulted my nose, err I mean Leela's Nose, and I got mad" the slightly muffled voice of Fry said.  
  
"All this over her nose! Jeeze Fry! I knew you liked Leela, but taking it out on me wasn't nice" sniffled Amy.  
  
"Yeah, it's only a nose" voiced Fry/Leela.  
  
"OK … Amy, Mr. Bleichman, says he'll meet you on Saturday at "The Hip Joint", although I thought you and Kif were an item" queried Leela/Fry.  
  
"We are, but Kif's on a Deep Space mission, and Jeremy is a close friend, who I asked to the club for a bit of company" responded Amy.  
  
"Oh yeah, right" came the scornful response from Leela/Fry.  
  
"OK, you two stop dis now," yelled Hermes.  
  
"Fry, you are obviously still suffering from dat illness, now go and see Zoidberg" he ordered.  
  
Fry/Leela made to get up automatically, when an unseen foot under the table kicked him in the leg and Leela/Fry coughed somewhat loudly.  
  
Shit, I'm Leela he though, Ok, how do I get out of this, they've seen me start to move.  
  
Fry/Leela scratched his ass conspicuously, and sat down again.  
  
"Damn these new panties of mine are really making me itch", he said aloud,  
  
He became aware that everyone was looking at him most notably himself, or rather Leela/Fry.  
  
She was staring at him open mouthed.  
  
I… uh changed…eh, detergents recently, perhaps I'm…uh allergic to the new one. He said trying to rescue the situation.  
  
He looked at Leela/Fry covertly and mouthed "sorry, what else was I supposed to do?"  
  
Leela/Fry got out of her chair and walked past Fry towards Dr Zoidberg's office, she 'accidentally', struck Fry/Leela on the head with her elbow as she past.  
  
"Owww" said Fry/Leela.  
  
"Oh sorry Leela", said Leela/Fry, "I didn't see you there".  
  
"Fry, You're a clumsy idiot, spat Fry/Leela, enjoying, being on the other end of one of Leela's insults for a change.  
  
Leela/Fry looked at Fry/Leela shocked for a moment,  
  
Fry/Leela smirked back at her, with a look that said "How do you like it?"  
  
She turned back stunned slightly and walked over to Zoidberg's office and knocked on the door.  
  
The door to Dr Zoidbergs Office opened, and Zoidberg waked out clutching a clipboard in his hands.  
  
He appeared to have gripped it slightly too tight as his pincers sliced the board in two.  
  
"Alwayz with the zplitting, I swear these boards must come from a defective batch, zat's ze tenth one zis morning. Ah yez, Fry, your first for ze autopsy." Said Dr Zoidberg.  
  
Now firztly I need you to ztrip down to your underwear, He went on.  
  
Leela/Fry began to get undressed folding Fry's clothes neatly and placing them on the chair in the corner of Zoidberg's Office, before remembering who she was and knocking them over the floor.  
  
When all that Leela/Fry was left wearing was a pair of light speed briefs she climbed up onto the examination couch.  
  
"Ok I am going to hook you up to ze diagnostic eqvipment", said Dr Zoidberg as he connected some electrodes to Leela/Fry's Body which will test your revlexes and such, vill zat is going on I vant you to read the letters on ze board over there back to me starting vith ze largest. " Said Zoidberg.  
  
"Uh ok" said Leela/Fry "L…U…A…P…D…N…A…Y…D…N…A…" He began  
  
"S…R…O…H…T…U…A…E…H...T" finished Leela/Fry several minutes later, "Thank goodness that over and done with, sighed Fry/Leela.  
  
"Very Good Fry" said Zoidberg Your Vision iz ztill 20/20.  
  
Zoidberg approached to remove the electrodes, forgetting that the machine had not quite finished the Involuntary reflex test, just in time for one of Leela/Fry's arms to spasm and hit him square in the face.  
  
Zoidberg went down like a lead balloon. His pincers involuntarily slicing another clipboard in two,  
  
WOW! Thought Leela/Fry, surprisingly there is some strength in Fry's arms.  
  
Leela/Fry leaped off the couch and knelt down beside Dr Zoidberg, who was gradually regaining control of his faculties.  
  
"Are you ok Dr Zoidberg?" She asked  
  
Zoidberg sat up somewhat unsteadily.  
  
Uhhhhh…perhaps zose 3 day-old octo-cray fish I had last night weren't so good! Feels like someone punched me in the head!" said Zoidberg  
  
"Uhhh…. Really, wow those fish must really have been off," said Leela/Fry helping Zoidberg up.  
  
"Am I done now?" Asked Leela/Fry getting dressed.  
  
"Vy yes send in Leela on your way out" said Zoidberg.  
  
"Ok" replied Leela/Fry.  
  
She opened the door to Zoidberg's office and beckoned Fry/Leela over.  
  
"Ok Fr…Leela it's your turn now, but be careful Dr Zoidberg uh… fainted" said Leela/Fry " he's feeling himself this morning".  
  
"Yeah him and me both" replied Fry to no one in particular as he passed  
  
On entering Fry/Leela saw Zoidberg Sitting in his chair looking dazed, his left eye slightly swollen, Fry/Leela turned and pocked her head back out the door,  
  
"Ehh Le… Fry could you maybe stay in here with me in case Dr Zoidberg faints again?" he shouted.  
  
"Uh sure if you don't mind getting undressed in front of me" replied Leela/Fry.  
  
"Uh…no why would …well, I'll make an exception this one time!" said Fry/Leela.  
  
Leela/Fry, made her way back to Dr Zoidberg's office, by the time she got through the Door Fry/Leela was busy taking off her pants,  
  
Leela/Fry saw the plain white bra and panties Fry/Leela had chosen,  
  
"Ok Leela, time for your test " said Zoidberg, as he began to wire up Fry/Leela with the diagnostic electrodes.  
  
"Now read the eye chart for me while the machine tests you" said Dr Zoidberg.  
  
" Uh ok" said Fry/Leela "E…I…D…A…M…A…R…U…T…U…F…" began Fry/Leela.  
  
"…T…E…L…T…O…N…L…L…I…W, there I'm done!" said Fry/Leela.  
  
Zoidberg began to unhook Fry/Leela from the machine,  
  
Fry Leela looked at Leela/Fry, "is the underwear I picked ok?" he asked.  
  
"Uh…Yeah…its, um…sexy," stammered a slightly shocked Leela/Fry  
  
"Oh cool!" said Fry/Leela.  
  
Leela/Fry Leaned over Fry/Leela and whispered in his ear, "Fry, remember you're me".  
  
"Ooops" said Fry/Leela.  
  
Leela/Fry went to move away, but before she could Fry/Leela's right arm shot out in a spasm and punched her straight in the stomach.  
  
"Ooofffff!" Groaned Leela/Fry as she doubled up.  
  
"Oh crap! Le…Fry I'm sorry!" exclaimed Fry/Leela leaping off the couch, and kneeling down beside his stricken friend.  
  
"Oh god I'm sorry, are you ok?" he asked  
  
"Unnngghhh! yeah I'll be ok, I think, It's ok, I kinda did the same thing to Zoidberg!" answered Leela/Fry.  
  
"You sure your gonna be ok?" asked Fry/Leela,  
  
"yeah, said Leela/Fry,  
  
She Looked at Fry/Leela who from the way he was kneeling was revealing slightly too much cleavage for Leela/Fry's liking.  
  
WOW! They are kinda big from this angle, thought Leela/Fry.  
  
"Uh hadn't you better get dressed?" asked Leela/Fry  
  
"Eh? Oh Yeah!" said Fry/Leela, who made to pick up his clothes.  
  
"But I'd see if Dr Zoidberg's finished with you first though," added Leela/Fry  
  
"Huh? Oh right!" said Fry/Leela, "Am I done Dr Zoidberg?" he asked.  
  
Zoidberg looked up from yet another broken clipboard.  
  
"Are you done?" Said Zoidberg blankly, "Done vhat? Oh yez wiz ze exam, yez, yez Leela you can get drezzed now. " Ok you are both fit to continue working, zo if you'll excuze me I'll go tell zis to Hermes." Said Zoidberg.  
  
*****************************************************************  
  
Leela and Fry left Zoidberg's office, a moment later Amy joined them as they headed back to the Conference Room.  
  
"So, you two OK now?" asked a concerned to Amy.  
  
"Yeah, we're fine", answered Leela/Fry.  
  
"Zoidberg said we were our normal selves," added Fry/Leela.  
  
Zoidberg left Hermes' office, and scuttled off, leaving a slightly confused Jamaican behind.  
  
"Why, we still employ him I'll never know" he muttered while scratching his head,  
  
"Now back to de paperwork, for dat trip to Los Angeles, we successfully delivered de Professor and his Synaptic Transposition Invention" he said aloud, just as Leela, Fry and Amy were walking past.  
  
Outside, Fry/Leela glanced at Leela/Fry with a look that said "So that's what it was!"  
  
Hermes looked up, and yelled "You three, get in here now, we've an urgent Top Secret delivery to make"  
  
"First things first, are you fit enough to fly de ship Leela"  
  
"I'm OK Hermes, never felt this good before", replied Fry/Leela, while avoiding the baleful stare from Leela/Fry.  
  
"OK, well before we took de Professor to Los Angeles, a Top Secret package was left here, and I need to go through the paperwork with you", explained Hermes.  
  
For a brief second Fry/Leela, looked a bit unsure of herself.  
  
"So what do we do, Leela, we don't need to be here", asked Leela/Fry, still thinking it odd having to ask herself what to do.  
  
"Fry, you and Bender, go get the package loaded onto a cargo dolly, and get it to the Docking Bay", answered Fry/Leela, after a couple of seconds thought.  
  
"Aye Aye Captain", responded Leela/Fry, with a slight look of concern on her face, as she headed down the corridor.  
  
"Amy, you go and remove what's left of Fry's chewing gum from under the table", instructed Hermes.  
  
"Poq Gai, not that again", muttered Amy, as she headed towards the lounge area.  
  
"OK, Captain, deal wit dis paperwork", said Hermes as he pointed to the chair on the other side of his desk.  
  
"OK, dis package is an urgent delivery to 'The Nimbus' he continued  
  
"Zapp's ship, what is it?" asked Fry/Leela.  
  
"I don't know, all it says is dat it's Top Secret and needs to be urgently delivered", he responded.  
  
"Oh, Amy ought to come with us, so she can see Kif, again", responded Fry/Leela.  
  
"You think that's wise", came the surprised response.  
  
"Yeah, I do, she deserves some time with him", she replied  
  
"Dis, is unlike you Leela, but OK, Amy can go along", he acknowledged and handed her the paperwork.  
  
Fry/Leela, reached out for the paperwork and closed her hands on thin air.  
  
"You sure you're OK, Leela" asked Hermes.  
  
"Yes, I am, just a bit of perception trouble, it still happens to me", he honestly answered.  
  
"OK, dat I can understand", he responded and this time pushed the paperwork across the desk. Fry/Leela reached out and grabbed it this time, while allowing a little smile to creep across his lips.  
  
"I'll head for the Docking Bay, and make sure those two have done what I asked", he said, and left Hermes' office.  
  
"Amy, get to the Docking Bay, you're going on a delivery run to "The Nimbus", with Leela and Fry", instructed Hermes over the intercom.  
  
"Yay, I can see Kif again", came the excited response.  
  
  
  
Leela/Fry, Fry/Leela, Amy and Bender, stood next to the "TOP SECRET" package waiting to be loaded into the PE Ships cargo hold.  
  
"Now remember you're me, Fry," whispered Leela/Fry. "So you'll have to give the loading orders to me and Bender"  
  
"I know, Leela, I'm not that stupid," replied Fry/Leela, also whispering.  
  
"Ok then, prove it, by acting like me and not screwing it up" shot back Leela/Fry.  
  
"Amy, you work the Magnetic Grab. Bender, Fry, move the crate and dolly into position" ordered Fry/Leela, trying his best to use the same tone and body language as Leela would.  
  
Leela/Fry moved towards the control panel, whispering "Good" as she went past.  
  
Amy stomped off towards Magnetic Grab's control muttering  
  
"Poq Gai" under her breath  
  
"I'm only here for the chance to meet Kif," she said out loud.  
  
"Amy, just do as I tell you," shouted Leela/Fry as she headed towards Bender. "Err, I meant do as Leela tells you", she corrected realising what she had said.  
  
"B'uh, what?" responded Amy looking at Fry/Leela for help.  
  
Before Fry/Leela could respond, Bender interjected with "Fry hasn't been Fry all day"  
  
Leela/Fry stopped in her tracks; she turned to look at an equally shocked Fry/Leela.  
  
They both mouthed, "How does he know!" at each other.  
  
"I'm sorry Bender I had a weird dream last night" said Bender in a mock Fry voice, "Jeeze! You skintubes are weird, letting things like that affect you. All I ever dream about is electric sheep!"  
  
Looks of relief appeared for a second on Fry and Leela's faces.  
  
"Amy, just work the Magnetic Grab and Fry, you get on with helping Bender", ordered Fry/Leela.  
  
Bender and Fry pushed the dolly to the centre of Loading Bay's open hatch.  
  
"Amy, load the crate onto the ship, Bender go to the Cargo hold and stand guard until further notice." Leela looked at Fry who was sweating, profusely, "and Fry…you go sit in the Bridge", ordered Fry/Leela.  
  
An exhausted Leela/Fry passed by.  
  
She muttered, "How the hell, do you live in this body?" to Fry/Leela  
  
Fry/Leela just shrugged his shoulders in response.  
  
Amy successfully loaded the crate and Bender stored it away, before taking up his usual guard duty position, and shutting down.  
  
"Must kill all humans," he muttered  
  
Fry/Leela headed for the Flight Deck, while Amy headed for her cabin for a nice cool shower and to get changed in preparation for meeting Kif.  
  
On arriving at the Flight Deck, Leela/Fry headed towards Fry/Leela, who was sat in the Captain's chair.  
  
"Um, isn't that my seat, Leela" asked Fry/Leela  
  
"It's my seat, Fry, yours is over there" responded Leela/Fry, pointing to the back of the bridge.  
  
"OK, but won't it look odd, me being you, in my chair, if Amy comes in", enquired Fry/Leela  
  
"This is my idea for keeping me as Pilot, while you act as Captain" came the response  
  
"Leela, please give me a chance to show you I can pilot the ship through lift off, I've already proved I can pilot it" asked Fry/Leela  
  
"OK, just this once, since you are me." sighed Leela/Fry as she got out of the chair. "I'll stand here and advise you until Amy appears, after that I'll try and keep watch on you, without giving the game away, OK"  
  
"Thank you, Leela", responded Fry/Leela as he made herself comfortable.  
  
"And stop calling me Leela," warned Leela/Fry  
  
"Well you called me Fry, a minute ago," retorted Fry/Leela  
  
At that moment, Amy walked in resplendent in the red dress she wore that Valentine's Day, "What you think? Do I look good enough for Kif?" she asked.  
  
Leela/Fry looked disapprovingly, but said "Very Nice, Amy."  
  
Fry/Leela turned around, "The last time I saw you in that, my head was on your shoulder"  
  
"What did you just say Leela?" responded Amy, shocked  
  
"Err, I meant Fry's head was on your shoulder", stuttered Fry/Leela  
  
"That was dumb, now we'll have to tell her," Leela/Fry whispered to Fry/Leela "otherwise she'll never stop asking!"  
  
"Sorry, It's just seeing that dress and the memory flooded back, I couldn't stop myself." Fry/Leela whispered back  
  
"Are you two OK?" asked a bewildered Amy.  
  
"Amy, I know you're going to have a hard time believing this coming from Fry, but what I'm about to tell you, it's the truth", said Leela/Fry.  
  
"Uh huh", responded a dazed Amy.  
  
"Yesterday, before me and Fry were taken unwell, we accidentally touched the Professor's invention, the one he's showing at LUNATIC, and somehow, me and Fry's minds switched bodies" said Leela/Fry.  
  
"So you're not Fry, you're Leela, and she's not Leela, he's Fry", a now totally perplexed Amy responded.  
  
"Yes" they replied simultaneously.  
  
"Now Amy, you're not to tell anyone this, until we work out how to get our minds back into our own bodies", instructed Leela/Fry.  
  
"B'uh! I can do that." came a half confident reply from Amy.  
  
"Good, now that you know, I can pilot the ship as Fry", said Leela/Fry  
  
"Aww! I wanted to make the ship Blast Off", came the strangled response from Fry/Leela.  
  
"OK, just this once you can, but as soon as we're clear of the Earth, we switch positions." Instructed Leela/Fry.  
  
"Thanks, Leela, said Fry/Leela relieved.  
  
"But if we swap positions, won't Zapp know something is wrong?", he added after a moments thought  
  
1.2.1.1.1 "You'll have to explain to Zapp, that you're teaching me to pilot the ship" answered Leela/Fry.  
  
1.2.1.1.2 "Uh, OK, I think I can manage that", stuttered Fry/Leela  
  
1.2.1.1.3 "But before we blast off, this time, make sure the Diamond Tether is not attached to anything first", asserted Leela/Fry  
  
"One small mistake, and you won't let me forget it", responded Fry/Leela  
  
"That small mistake, got us and Bender fired, we were lucky the Professor gave us our jobs back" answered Leela/Fry. "I don't want to be a Pizza Delivery Person again."  
  
"Neither do I", muttered Fry/Leela under his breath  
  
"OK, OK, you win, will you guide me, please, Leela", pleaded Fry/Leela  
  
"Sure, Fry, on the condition that you do exactly what I say" answered Leela/Fry  
  
"You know I'll do anything for you, Leela", smiled Fry/Leela back at her.  
  
"Before we take off, I've a question for Fry" asked Amy trying not to look at Leela/Fry  
  
"Yeah, sure Amy", responded Fry/Leela  
  
"Does it feel any different being in Leela's body, than being on my shoulder", inquired Amy, putting a hand on her scarred left shoulder.  
  
"Amy! what kind of a question is that", came the stormy response from Leela/Fry, "Now sit in Bender's place and please keep quiet."  
  
"Yes, Sir, err Ma'am" responded Amy.  
  
"Leela, did you have to snap at her, she only asked a question", reacted a puzzled Fry/Leela  
  
"Forget it Fry, we've a package to deliver to Zapp", responded Leela/Fry with disdain.  
  
"OK, so what do I do next, the Diamond Tether is fully retracted", asked Fry/Leela, having first double-checked the console.  
  
Leela/Fry took Fry/Leela through the launch sequence step-by-step.  
  
"Ok Fry now you can start the main engines" said Leela/Fry finally after numerous checks and rechecks  
  
Fry/Leela pressed the illuminated button marked "Main Engine Start"  
  
He felt a vibration pass through the ship and heard the thrum of the engines begin to build in his ears.  
  
"Now Fry" said Leela/Fry "Move the ship into launch position, and raise the blast shield.  
  
Fry/Leela hit these buttons in turn  
  
He felt himself being raised through several degrees; he saw the view through ships window change from the far end of the hanger to the steely grey of the cloudy New New York sky  
  
Behind the ship a large flap of metal flipped up out of the floor to deflect the exhaust gases of the ships engines away from the rest of the Planet Express hanger.  
  
"Ok Fry said Leela/Fry "now slowly throttle up the engine power all the way up to full"  
  
Fry/Leela took hold of the throttle control and slowly moved the handle up to full power.  
  
The thrum from the engines began to change pitch and build in intensity to a whine.  
  
The vibration began to increase until after what seemed an eternity; Fry/Leela, Leela/Fry and Amy felt the ship lift off the launch pad and blast off and head into space.  
  
Leela/Fry nodded approvingly at Fry/Leela and commented "Nice Take Off, couldn't have done it better myself".  
  
"Now we switch positions?" asked an obviously disappointed Fry/Leela.  
  
"No, I think I can trust you to get us there, plus Zapp won't think anything is wrong." Replied Leela/Fry; "Although I will keep an eye on you to make sure nothing goes wrong".  
  
"You mean two eyes", came the quick response from Fry/Leela.  
  
"Yeah, yeah, OK." responded Leela/Fry as she headed back to her chair.  
  
"Leela … err I mean Fry, sorry for asking that question earlier", said Amy.  
  
"That's OK, Amy, I know it must be especially confusing for you, and please remember I'm Fry." replied Leela/Fry.  
  
"Ok, I'll do my best", responded Amy  
  
"The best way, is look at me and think Fry, as that is who you are looking at, similarly the same goes for Leela", advised Leela/Fry  
  
"Yeah, I can do that and you'd better act like Fry as well", answered Amy.  
  
"I am, I'm in his chair", explained Leela/Fry  
  
"No, you haven't got your feet on the console, and you're not relaxed enough", stated Amy  
  
"OK, I'll do that." Replied Leela/Fry, as she twisted the chair around and hoisted both feet onto the console, and crossed hands behind his head.  
  
"That's better, you look more like Fry now", chuckled Amy.  
  
  
  
On the bridge of "The Nimbus", Zapp was sitting in the Captain's Chair, looking expectantly at the forward view screen. Kif was at his monitoring console, when it chirped into life, informing him of the news that both of them were waiting for.  
  
"Captain, the Planet Express ship carrying the TOP SECRET cargo and Amy is on it's way towards us" remarked Kif  
  
"Good, Good, I can't wait to see the Lady Leela again." replied Zapp.  
  
"And I can't wait to see Amy again", wistfully replied Kif.  
  
"Kif, Do you think Leela will like my freshly washed Velour uniform", asked Zapp.  
  
"Yes, Captain", sighed Kif despondently.  
  
"How long until they arrive, I can hardly wait" enquired Zapp.  
  
"They'll be here in 2 to 3 hours, Captain", responded Kif, after checking with his console.  
  
"That quick. I've got to get the Lovenasium ready. Kif you're in charge", as he got out of his chair, and headed for the doors of the Bridge.  
  
"Oh and Kif, inform me when they've arrived, so I can meet them, we really need that box." informed Zapp, just before the doors to the bridge closed, narrowly missing the end of his nose.  
  
Kif sighed "Yes captain", as he sat reluctantly in the Captain's Chair.  
  
  
  
Back on the Flight Deck of the Planet Express Ship. Leela/Fry stood behind Fry/Leela, watching every move, like Hawk watching it's prey.  
  
"Leela, why are you stood behind me?" asked Fry/Leela  
  
"Just checking, that you're doing everything correctly, which you are", Leela/Fry answered in surprise.  
  
"OK, OK, now go and check on Bender, see that he's guarding the crate", instructed Fry/Leela  
  
"Hey I'm the Captain, and I give the orders around here", answered Leela/Fry.  
  
"Leela… err Fry, you're Fry not Leela, I think that's what I mean", came a confused explanation from Amy.  
  
"Yeah, you are, now get to it", ordered Fry/Leela.  
  
"Ok, I forgot who I was for a moment, and do I act like that all the time?" responded a shocked Leela/Fry.  
  
"Yeah, you do", came in unison from both Fry/Leela and Amy.  
  
Leela/Fry headed for the Flight Deck door, muttering "I'm learning a valuable lesson here, if I ever get my body back, I'll remember this."  
  
"How are you adapting to only having one eye, Fry?" asked Amy, when the door had closed behind Leela/Fry  
  
"It's still a bit weird", answered Fry/Leela.  
  
"So, you've got used to the Depth Perception problem?" enquired Amy.  
  
"Sorta, I still miss things first time. Now I know how hard it must be for Leela", truthfully replied Fry/Leela.  
  
"OK. I hope Kif is there to meet me. How much longer till we're there?" queried Amy  
  
"It's going to be at least 2 hours, Amy", replied Fry/Leela  
  
"Oh, I'll go to my Cabin and do my make-up until then." answered Amy, as she stood up.  
  
"Amy, stay here, please?" reacted Fry/Leela.  
  
"Why?" responded Amy  
  
"It'll be no fun up here, on my own and I could use your company", replied Fry/Leela.  
  
"Oh, OK." answered Amy, as she sat back down again.  
  
As Leela/Fry walked down the corridor towards the Cargo Bay, he passed through the Galley, and came to the crew's cabins. After passing Amy's and Bender's, she stopped outside Leela's for a brief moment, looked at it wistfully and thought, "Oh well, no sleeping in there later on."  
  
The next cabin was Fry's, "Better take a look at my new room, for one night, I hope", she muttered to herself.  
  
On opening the door, she stood dumbfounded for a couple of seconds, the room was an absolute mess, and stuff was thrown everywhere.  
  
"How, the hell did Fry get this cabin to look like this? I'm meant to sleep in here?" an irritated Leela/Fry thought to herself.  
  
She slammed the door shut, and set off purposefully to the Cargo Bay.  
  
After entering the Cargo Bay, which contained one "Top Secret" crate and an apparently sleeping Robot.  
  
Leela/Fry yelled at the top of his voice, "I thought you were meant to be guarding the crate, not sleeping, Bender".  
  
Bender's eye plate gently rolled back, as he seemed to come back into operation.  
  
"Fry will ya quit yelling, I'm trying to sleep here", answered Bender.  
  
"You're meant to be guarding the crate, not Sleeping", angrily responded Leela/Fry  
  
"Where's it gonna go, " shot back Bender, sarcastically.  
  
"It's TOP SECRET cargo, you can't be asleep and guard that." retorted Leela/Fry.  
  
"Jeeze! Fry what's got into, any one would think you where Leela." retaliated Bender,  
  
Everything went still in the Cargo Bay for a couple of seconds, while Bender's last statement hit home.  
  
"Oh sorry, Bender, that dream must still be affecting me", meekly replied Leela/Fry.  
  
"You humans and your dreams, sheesh. I give up" responded Bender, as he got a bottle of beer out, and started to drink it.  
  
"OK, Bender, try and stay awake then?" asked Leela/Fry.  
  
"Yeah, yeah, alright", disdainfully responded Bender.  
  
"I'll go and tidy my Cabin, if I'm to sleep in there", Leela/Fry muttered to herself, as she turned and left the Cargo Bay.  
  
As soon as Leela/Fry was out of sight, Bender muttered "Humans", and then closed his eye plate and went back to sleep.  
  
Leela/Fry stopped outside of Fry's Cabin and with a certain amount of apprehension, opened the door and went in.  
  
"Jeez, where do I start in here, talk about an Impossible Mission", she said to herself.  
  
"I'll start by attempting to remove all that crap off the bed, so at least I can get some sleep in here, if nothing else" she muttered.  
  
As she approached the bed, suddenly everything went black. She staggered to grab hold of anything in an effort not to fall down, and by chance grabbed hold of the top of his chair. Suddenly the blackness seemed to fade away, and an angry looking face was yelling at her.  
  
"Phil, I thought I told you to make your bed, you haven't touched the sheets your mother placed on the bed in anticipation of you making it, and don't tell me you slept on the floor again!"  
  
"Whoa, this must be Fry's father, I guess I'm somehow seeing one of his memories and Fry wasn't lying to me earlier today, I'll have to apologise to him", she noted subconsciously.  
  
"I did" she heard Fry respond  
  
"Why?" came the stormy response  
  
"I didn't want to make the bed wrong again." came the feeble sounding response.  
  
"You didn't want to make the bed wrong AGAIN!" Yancey Sr. yelled incredulously.  
  
"I've shown you so many times, how to make a bed to proper military standards, now get to it, before I ground you" Yancey Fry Sr. screamed.  
  
"OK Dad, I'll try to", came Fry's weak response  
  
"You'll TRY! ... I've told you God knows how many times, and you still have to try", he yelled even more venomously, the blood vessels in his face looked like they were trying to escape.  
  
"OK, but why do I have to make it that way", Fry asked nervously.  
  
"Phil, if you don't make start on making that bed within the next 60 seconds and stop asking dumb questions, there will be hell to pay", he roared.  
  
"OK Dad, I'll start now", meekly responded Fry as he turned and started on the task in hand.  
  
"Good, I'll be back in 3 minutes, and God help you if it isn't done right", yelled his father as he left the room and slammed the door behind him.  
  
Almost as suddenly as the memory had started, it faded away and Leela/Fry felt her equilibrium return to normal.  
  
"Well that was educational, I didn't know Fry's dad was that rough on him, that explains why he's so untidy, he's still rebelling against his dad's enforced authority", she whispered quietly.  
  
After spending the next hour and half, giving the Cabin a sense of tidiness, Leela/Fry stood back and admired a job well done.  
  
"Phew, that was hard work, especially in this body, I'd better take a shower to remove this sweat", she thought to herself.  
  
After hunting through Fry's clothes chest, she eventually located a clean pair of Lightspeed Briefs, another white T-shirt, and hidden at the bottom was a large towel, she headed towards the door that led to the bathroom.  
  
On entering the bathroom, she was more than a little surprised to find it mainly clean and relatively tidy.  
  
"Wow, he's even got some Shower Gel and Shampoo", she expressed in surprise.  
  
She then proceeded to remove his clothing, placing the sneakers, jeans and jacket, outside the door, and placed the T-shirt and briefs into the chute, that eventually deposited them on the floor of the Laundry Room.  
  
After stepping into the shower, and out of instinct, pulling the curtain across the doorway, she looked down and seeing Fry's naked body from a different perspective, muttered "This is one body, more in need of a fitness regime, than any other known to man. Maybe I should offer to help Fry get it into a better shape."  
  
After turning the faucets, and waiting for a few seconds while the water temperature reached an acceptable level for showering, she proceeded to rinse away the sweat, and then after grabbing the Shower Gel, she started to cover his body in it.  
  
"Jeez, when did Fry last shower properly, I'm gonna have my work cut out cleaning up his body as well", she said aloud to herself after discovering dirt between his toes.  
  
"Leela, we're approaching The Nimbus, and I'd like some help", came over the intercom system.  
  
"OK Fry, I'll be along shortly, I'm in the shower" she responded.  
  
On the bridge Fry/Leela looked horrified, as that bit of information filtered through his mind.  
  
"She's showering my body and I'm not there", he managed to stutter.  
  
At her console, Amy attempted to suppress a chuckle.  
  
"What was that for?" he asked.  
  
"Oh, I just found it amusing ... the thought of Leela washing your body", she responded.  
  
"Yeah, I s'pose it is. Not like she hasn't seen it all before", admitted an ashamed Fry/Leela, as he turned to concentrate on the steering the ship towards The Nimbus.  
  
About 5 minutes later, Leela/Fry stepped out of the shower, and admired the level of cleanliness she'd achieved, and the fact that she'd only just remembered not to try and put her hair into a ponytail.  
  
"Better get dressed and go and help Fry out on the Bridge, we must be close to The Nimbus by now", she thought to herself.  
  
A few minutes later, Leela/Fry entered the bridge and noticed that The Nimbus was looming large through the main windows.  
  
"Fry, I think all Ship's communications should be done by Amy." Leela/Fry instructed.  
  
"But, why?" came the strangled response from Fry/Leela.  
  
"You might accidentally say something that will give away what has happened to us", came the forceful response.  
  
Fry/Leela shrugged her shoulders and despondently vacated the Captain's chair saying, "You're still the Captain, after all".  
  
"Amy, now be careful what you say to Zapp, please", asked Leela/Fry.  
  
"OK, I can handle this", confidently answered Amy as she sat in the chair.  
  
"Fry, I'd like a quiet word with you in the hallway", Leela/Fry informed Fry/Leela.  
  
"OK, what have I done now?" he responded.  
  
"Nothing, now come on", answered Leela/Fry as she turned from the captain's chair and headed off the flight deck, Fry/Leela followed albeit with some reluctance.  
  
"Fry, I'd like to apologise to you for doubting you this morning, when I found you unconscious, and then you told me it was all due to a memory of mine." said Leela/Fry, once the Flight Deck door had closed behind them.  
  
"Yeah, I remember that", he responded.  
  
"Well, I've just had a similar vision of your past, so now I know you weren't lying to me about it" she expressed.  
  
"That's OK, Leela, I've already forgiven you for doubting me", he answered.  
  
From the Flight Deck, Amy excitedly yelled, "Hey, I can see The Nimbus."  
  
Leela and Fry walked back in, and stood next to the Captain's Chair, Leela/Fry watching Amy's every move, with all the intensity of a tiger stalking it's prey.  
  
****************************************************************  
  
"Captain, the Planet Express ship is within visual range", reported Kif to Zapp via The Nimbus' Intercom.  
  
"Good, Good, give them permission to land, as soon as Leela contacts you", replied Zapp.  
  
"Aye Captain" responded Kif.  
  
A couple of seconds later, the Ship's Communication Panel chirped into life.  
  
"This is the Planet Express ship, with a Top Secret cargo, requesting Docking clearance?" asked the voice.  
  
"Amy, this is Kif, are you in charge of the ship?" he responded quizzically.  
  
"G'uh, I'm the only one on the Bridge at the minute", answered Amy  
  
"Where's Leela?" asked Kif  
  
"She and Fry are in the... uh... Cargo Hold, making sure the crate is safe", uncertainly answered Amy.  
  
"Oh, OK, well, you can dock in Bay 5, then", replied Kif.  
  
"Thank you, Kif, you are sweet and I really need to tell you something… OUCH!" responded Amy.  
  
"What happened?" asked a concerned Kif.  
  
"Nothing much, I... uh, hit my knee on the Steering Column", answered Amy.  
  
"OK, I'll see you in Bay 5 shortly, and be more careful" replied Kif as he closed the Communication channel.  
  
"Sir, The Planet Express ship will be landing in Bay 5 shortly" he reported to Zapp via the Internal Communications Channel.  
  
"The Lady Leela and my crate, nearly here." gasped Zapp  
  
"On my way" he continued.  
  
On the bridge of the Planet Express ship, Amy stood next to the Captain's Chair, rubbing her leg.  
  
"Why, did you kick me Leela? " she asked Leela/Fry.  
  
"It was to get you off the Comms Channel before you told Kif, what happened to us", she responded.  
  
"Fl'uh, I said I wouldn't tell Kif, didn't I." Amy responded.  
  
"Err, Leela can you help me, I've never landed a ship before", interrupted Fry/Leela.  
  
"OK, Fry, let's do this step-by-step", responded Leela/Fry.  
  
1.2.1.1.3.1 "Ok" responded Fry/Leela.  
  
"First move the ship and come round till you're lined up with the nimbus's docking bays" Said Leela/Fry.  
  
Fry adjusted the PE ships course and reduced the amount of thrust produced by the engines, the thrum from the stern of the ship decreased slightly.  
  
"Now steer the ship slowly towards Bay five" said Leela  
  
Fry reduced the main engine's power again, the thrum decreasing even further.  
  
He altered course slightly again heading straight for the opening of docking bay 5  
  
"Before we go and meet Zapp and Kif, let's remember who we are!" instructed Leela/Fry to Fry/Leela and Amy, at the top of the ships' stairs.  
  
"OK", they both responded.  
  
Fry/Leela walked down them, doing his best to walk like Leela. Leela/Fry followed, with Amy pointing out, that Leela/Fry needed to slouch more to walk like Fry.  
  
"Ah, the Lady Leela and others" greeted Zapp  
  
"Huh, Hi Zapp, nice to see you again" replied Fry/Leela. Behind him, Leela/Fry slapped his hand against his head.  
  
"Remember you're Leela, act like her", a voice kept saying in Fry's mind.  
  
"So, you've come to your senses and want more of the Zapper", responded Zapp.  
  
"No Zapp, we're only here to deliver the package and get out-a-here." forcefully responded Fry/Leela. Leela/Fry inwardly allowed herself a small smile of thank you.  
  
"Fry, you go and help Bender unload the cargo" ordered Fry/Leela.  
  
"Yes Ma'am", said Leela/Fry as he headed off to the Cargo Bay.  
  
"Deliver the Cargo to my quarters, when you've unloaded it," shouted Zapp.  
  
An unintelligible response was heard coming from Leela/Fry.  
  
"Um, what about me?" enquired Amy.  
  
"Amy, you go and talk to Kif, you're not dressed to work", replied Fry/Leela.  
  
"OK, Fry... err Leela, Thank You", answered Amy as she walked over to Kif.  
  
"Right Zapp, let's go and sort this paperwork out", instructed Fry/Leela, before Zapp could notice Amy's Freudian slip.  
  
"The Lovenasium is set-up and ready my darling", replied Zapp  
  
"The what?" queried Fry/Leela  
  
"You don't remember that night, but I do." purred Zapp with a grin that would have done the Cheshire Cat proud.  
  
"Remember you're Leela, act like her" the voice repeated in Fry's mind.  
  
"Oh THAT night, anyway, the Bridge is more of a suitable place to conduct this kind of business, and what is in the crate, that's so TOP SECRET?" asked Fry/Leela as she headed towards the Bridge.  
  
"I shouldn't say, but to a fellow captain who I'm in love with, I'll tell you", answered Zapp.  
  
"It's my new Full length, multi-sensory enhancing vibrating bed, you want to help me test it?" he asked quickly.  
  
"Zapp, I wouldn't lay on the same bed with you again, if you paid me, now Let's Go!", angrily responded Leela, as she set off out of the Landing Bay.  
  
"But…but" responded a shocked Zapp, as he followed her.  
  
"So Amy, what do you want to do?" asked Kif, as Leela and Zapp went past them.  
  
"Well, Kif, something your cabin is well suited for", answered Amy, with a lecherous grin on her face.  
  
"Uh, err, OK, Amy", replied Kif, as Amy grabbed him by the arm, and started to drag him out of the Landing Bay. 


	2. Part II Leela And Fry Continue To Exper...

Previously On Futurama - Minds Apart (a fanfic by Andy and Paul - Not affiliated in any way with FOX! - "Thank Goodness")   
  
After an accident involving Fry, Leela and one of the Professors inventions our hapless duo woke up to find themselves in each others bodies.  
  
Having decided to try and hide this fact to from the others until they can figure out how to swap back they now find themselves having to deliver a crate to Zapp Brannigans ship "The Nimbus", where Fry experiences Zapp's obsession with Leela First hand!!  
  
  
Note to newbies to this fic and people with minds like sieves (I mean its only been like 6 months since Part 1 came out!).   
  
Frys mind in Leela's body is referred to as 'Fry/Leela' and therefore Leela in Fry's body is 'Leela/Fry'. Simple!   
  
Now go read the fic already !!   
  
  
Minds Apart - Part II  
  
"God I hate that man sooooooo much!" muttered Leela/Fry as she made her way over to the ships exterior cargo hatch release.  
  
"And to think I actually slept with him!" She thought, shuddering involuntarily, as she remembered one event in her past she wished had never happened.  
  
"What's yanking your chain meatball?" asked Bender, who was walking under the cargo hatch, "Worried that General Girdle Gut will put you to shame and get Leela in the sack again?" he continued.  
  
Leela/Fry eyed Bender sternly and flicked the hatch release catch.  
  
"WHAT THE…!" yelled Bender as the cargo hatch swung down, caught him by the antenna and threw him across the room.  
  
The crate slid off the cargo hatch with a thud.   
  
Bender's head came to rest a short distance away from his body, which got up and flailed about madly.  
  
"Hey!" yelled Bender's head "My ass is busted!"   
  
"Really?" replied Leela/Fry dryly "I never knew you were that way inclined, now come on, quit yer belly aching and lets get this unloaded!"  
  
"You know something Fry!" spat Bender as he screwed his head back on and walked over to Leela/Fry, "You're beginning to sound like more like Leela everyday! I mean before when you used to talk about her all the time; "Leela's great…Leela's soooo cute… she's sooo clever"…that I could handle, but now your beginning to act like a freaking obsessive, so either you cut the crap and start acting like yourself again or I tell Leela about your…"  
  
"Porn stash?" said Leela/Fry desperately trying to come up with a Fry like answer.  
  
"No!" said Bender, his voice gaining a dark menacing edge, "something worse… your poetry about her!"  
  
"His what!" stammered Leela/Fry, caught off guard by this unexpected turn of events.  
  
"Yeah, don't try and act all innocent and deny it, I found your notepad stuffed down the back of the couch when I was raiding your room for cash one day" said Bender.  
  
"I…I…" stuttered Leela/Fry.  
  
"OK lets see if this jogs your memory then Fry", said Bender before putting on a Fry-like voice  
  
"Oh lovely Leela you are my life, why wont you be my wife?"  
  
"Why did you go with Zapp when he's a complete dork?"  
  
"You never seem to trust me, always watching me like a hawk!"   
  
"You're always there when I need you, even though I ain't got a clue!"   
  
"You've saved my life so many times, damn I hope this rhymes!"  
  
"Oh wait the next bits a doozy, I cant wait till I tell Leela this bit", said Bender with a malicious laugh, before continuing, with his mock Fry impression   
  
"What do I have to do to prove how much I love you!"  
  
"AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" ROARED Bender,   
  
Leela/Fry stood there, speechless.   
  
"Yeah, you think about that, Mr. Shakestupid! Now where's the crate going?" said Bender lighting up a cigar and lifting the somewhat, splintered crate up with the hover dolly.   
  
Leela/Fry pointed the way, dumbfounded.  
  
"He writes poetry about me?" Was the only thought in her head at that moment. "OK its not very good poetry but its sooo sweet."   
  
Leela/Fry wandered off after bender, a slight dazed smile on his face.  
  
****  
  
"So Kif, I can't wait to see your quarters," said Amy as they walked hand-in-hand through the corridors of The Nimbus.  
  
"Why? There isn't much to it", answered Kif.  
  
"Well, it's the first time I've been on board a military vessel, and I've often dreamt of how you live"  
  
"It's not much of a life, taking commands from a buffoon, and.. Oh, here we are at the door now", he said as he reached out and pressed the panel to open it.  
  
Before the door had fully opened, Amy shot into the room.  
  
"It's a bit on the small side, and there's only a single bunk", she said disappointedly.  
  
"If you think that's bad, I'm right underneath Zapp's quarters, and that can get noisy, especially when he's entertaining a guest", he replied, remembering the night Zapp ensnared Leela.  
  
"That'll mean we can't have a quiet time together, if Leela err Fry and Bender are storing Zapp's new bed in there"  
  
"You okay, Amy?" asked a concerned Kif  
  
"Why?"  
  
"I thought you said Leela originally and then quickly changed it to Fry"  
  
"Err, I only remember saying Fry and Bender" quickly lied Amy and turned to look out of the porthole, so Kif wouldn't notice her cheeks turning red.  
  
"Okay, I guess it's me who is nervous"  
  
"You're not still nervous about being alone with me are you?"  
  
"Y-Y-Yes, I am" he said as he sat down on his bed, his head falling into his hand so that Amy wouldn't see how embarrassed he was.  
  
"That explains why you never shut the door behind you then, unless you leave it open all the time" she replied with a mischievous look on her face.  
  
"Yes, that's why", came the muffled response  
  
Amy turned away from the porthole and looked at him, realizing for the first time just how nervous he was being alone with her.  
  
"Aww he really is nervous about being alone with me, I'll have to make him feel more comfortable"  
  
As she walked past him towards the only free space on his bed, the various newspaper clippings pasted onto the wall, showing their first meeting on the Titanic and subsequent return to Earth caught her attention.  
  
Below the one showing a picture of them parting on their return to Earth, was her mobile phone number, with love hearts at both ends.  
  
"Aww, that's sweet of you Kiffy, keeping a record of our first meeting", she said, as she lifted his head out of his hands, turned him towards her, and gently kissed him.  
  
"What was that for" he asked in a surprised tone  
  
"To make you feel better and to let you know, you're the only one for me"  
  
"Aww, hee hee, that's nice of you Amy. You make my life seem worthwhile after the way Zapp treats me" was his response, as he lent across her and pressed the panel to close the door.   
  
"You and Zapp have a few problems?"  
  
"That's a wild and dangerous understatement. He's a fat buffoon and I'll never figure out how he became Captain"  
  
"Yeah, I got that impression from when Leela talked about him"  
  
"Some of the things he asked me to do are unbelievable: like preparing his formal underwear and then helping him into them. He seems to regard me as his slave"  
  
"HE WHAT?" exploded Amy, "I won't let him get away with that"  
  
"Amy, please calm down, this isn't like you"  
  
"Kif, why do you let him do that to you?"  
  
"He's my captain and I have take orders from him, like you do from Leela"  
  
"Yeah, guess so. I'm still going to let him know what I think of it though"  
  
"Please Amy, don't do anything I could regret later, it's bad enough already."  
  
"I'm just gonna let him know what I think of the way he treats you, but first we've some important business of our own" she spoke with a glint in her eye  
  
"Uh, huh, you mean…"   
  
"Yup, I do" as she placed both arms around his body and drew him closer. Then just as she felt his arms clasp behind her back, she used her body to push him backwards, until both were in the prone position, and then proceeded to give him the biggest and most passionate kiss of his life.  
  
****  
  
Fry/Leela, followed Zapp, along the corridors of the Nimbus, before Zapp stopped for a minute and leaned against the wall,  
  
"Oh I nearly forgot, said Zapp, the Bridge is being, uh, fumigated"  
  
"Fumigated?" asked Fry/Leela, "For what?"  
  
"Oh, while on a planet fall, one of our more, um, less particular, crew members, caught a nasty strain of Intergalactic gonad eating crotch lice" replied Zapp "so we'll have to complete the transaction in my, err, ready room"  
  
"Uhhhhh, sure" said Fry/Leela moving slightly further away from Zapp,  
  
"So are you … I mean is the crew member alright?" asked Fry/Leela  
  
"Oh yes, all that is required is for the affected area to be smothered in a soothing, moist, medicated and ooooh so warm ointment, by some young fresh medical ensign," said Zapp, with a misty look in his eye and what looked suspiciously like drool leaking from the corner of his mouth.  
  
Fry/Leela moved even further away, a shudder passing through him.  
  
"Can we perhaps get this translation, err, transma… paper work finished, Zapp? I have other deliveries to make!" said Fry/Leela impatiently.  
  
"Certainly" said Zapp, "My ready room is right through those doors at the end of this corridor"  
  
"Well let's go," said Fry/Leela  
  
"After you" said Zapp  
  
Fry/Leela eyed Zapp suspiciously for a second before moving off  
  
"Boy I'd like to break his face about now"   
  
Zapp watched Fry/Leela go, a smug grin spreading across his face, he stopped leaning against the wall revealing a signpost pointing towards the doors Fry/Leela was heading toward.  
  
'STEAM ROOM' read the sign  
  
"Hehehehe, soon my pretty you will once again be my woman!" whispered Zapp to himself, as he moved after Fry/Leela.  
  
He barely noticed the young officer walking in the opposite direction to him.  
  
Zapp grunted a cursory greeting to Lt. Adaoye as she saluted in the passing.  
  
She glanced back, a concerned look upon her face,  
  
"Oh dear god not his patented steam room maneuver!" she thought shuddering recalling her own lucky escape.  
  
With that Lt. Adaoye rushed off to locate some help.  
  
****  
  
Bender was busy guiding the hover dolly and it's somewhat tattered burden, through the labyrinth like corridors and walk ways of The Nimbus, towards Zapp's personal quarters.  
  
Leela/Fry was a short distance behind, her mind going over certain things Bender had said about Fry and his love for her.   
  
"Leela's great…Leela's soooo cute… she's sooo clever… Oh Lovely Leela You Are My Life, why wont you be my wife?"  
  
"Fry really does think the world of me, even after all the abuse I've given him, including the stuff he did deserve", she thought to herself.  
  
"And I hate to think what would have happened if he hadn't deciphered the note from my parents…"  
  
"I'd have killed them…"  
  
Leela/Fry was shaken out of her thoughts by a shout from Bender  
  
"Hey Fry! A little help please" said Bender trying to guide the hover dolly round particularly tight corner  
  
"Uh yeah be right with you, Bender!" said Leela/Fry as he moved to help  
  
"Excuse me but would you be the delivery people from Planet Express, said a voice from behind them.  
  
"Yeah who's askin?" replied Bender looking at the newcomer  
  
"Lt. Lenihan" replied the young DOOP officer "1st officer Kroeker sent me to assist you, pardon me but may I inquire where the lovely Captain Leela is?" he continued  
  
"She's with General 'Accident'" replied Bender  
  
"Jeez another guy! Who's interested in me" thought Leela/Fry  
  
"Oh! She's with Captain Brannigan?" replied Lt. Lenihan, with a concerned tone.  
  
"Jeez I can see the DOOP only take the best n brightest recruits, if you were any sharper you'd cut yourself!" replied Bender sarcastically  
  
"Well perhaps with my assistance we can complete the given task and go to her aid, all the sooner" replied Lt. Lenihan, unfazed by Bender's comment.  
  
"Yeah whatever, skirt boy," said Bender  
  
"Must help save Leela", muttered Lt. Lenihan as he walked briskly past Bender and Leela/Fry totally ignoring the last remark, and continued down the corridor without slowing.  
  
"Jerkwad, ain't you forgetting something" yelled Bender after the rapidly departing Lieutenant.  
  
"Bender, just hoist the damned dolly, and let's get going I don't trust Zapp" ordered Leela/Fry.  
  
"Yeah, yeah. Still thinking like Leela, will you ever give that up?" retorted Bender as he pressed the Dolly's Anti-Grav start button.  
  
"Must remember I'm Fry, otherwise Bender will mock me forever", thought Leela/Fry, as a faint redness briefly crossed his face.  
  
"Hey Fry, that extra redness matches your jacket nicely" mocked Bender as he set off down the corridor.  
  
"Thanks Bender" was all Leela/Fry could come up with in the way of a response.  
  
Just as they approached Zapp's Quarters, they heard the muffled sound of two people colliding, hotly followed by a few mild curses.  
  
"What the hell happened?" asked Leela/Fry as they approached the entangled pair.  
  
"I .. er she, came charging down the corridor and collided with me", answered Lenihan as he and a female Lieutenant got up off the floor.  
  
"You fool, look where you going?" answered the female Lieutenant  
  
"OK, Well I know him, but who the hell are you?" asked Bender, pointing accusing fingers at them.  
  
"I'm Lt. Adaoye, and I think you wonderful" she replied looking up at him, with tears of joy welling up in her puppy dog eyes.  
  
"Yeah baby, you got that right" an extremely pleased Bender answered  
  
"Hey Bender, looks like you've got a friend for life" said Leela/Fry, nudging him in the back, and hurting his elbow.  
  
"I seen you here before, you my God." Adaoye stuttered out, staring at him in sheer admiration.  
  
"You're not so bad yourself for a human" he answered  
  
"Look you two lovebirds, my Leela could be in danger" interrupted Lenihan.  
  
"'My' Leela? Talk about possessive. He must REALLY think he loves me"  
  
Breaking her gaze away from Bender for a brief second, and looking straight at Fry, Lt. Adaoye informed him, about Leela and Zapp and the Steam Room, before diverting her gaze back to Bender.  
  
"Fry's with Zapp! In a Steam Room! Oh My God! I've got to rescue him!" yelled Leela/Fry as he shot off down the corridor, knocking Lenihan headfirst into the box on the dolly, rendering him unconscious.  
  
Before Bender could react to what Leela/Fry had yelled, Adaoye jumped up and started hugging and kissing him.  
  
"Jeez girl, you sure do have the hots for me" he managed to say as he eventually managed to get Adaoye off of him.  
  
"Fry is with Zapp"!? .. But Fry ran off down the corridor .. Now I know he's gone nuts" said the stream of binary data pulsing through Bender's cerebral circuits.  
  
A soft moaning sound drifted up from the floor, and as Bender and Adaoye turned to look downwards, Lenihan raised a hand to his head and patted the lump and bruise that were appearing.  
  
"OUCH! Anyone get the number of that Delivery Van" he moaned.  
  
"You OK?" asked a slightly concerned Adaoye  
  
"He looks like he's ready to take on the Killbots single handedly." said Bender  
  
"Where's Fry gone?" asked Lenihan looking around him.  
  
"That's who knocked you into the boxes while charging off to rescue Fry err Leela" answered Bender  
  
"I hope Leela tells him off for leaving us, that idiot!" venomously spat out Lenihan.  
  
"He's not an idiot, he's cute, but not as cute as you" replied Adaoye looking up at Bender with a glint in her eyes.  
  
"Look skirt boy, now he's ran off, let's finish delivering this crate, this ain't a one robot moving show" yelled Bender as he set off at speed up the corridor.  
  
Lieutenants Adaoye and Lenihan chased after him, only catching up as he approached Zapp's Quarters.  
  
"OK, we're here" gasped Lenihan as he stopped next to Bender.  
  
"You gonna open the doors, or do I kick them down"  
  
"I open the doors for my God" said Adaoye, as she pressed the numbers 4-3-2-1 into the keypad, then pressed the Green Open Door button.  
  
"How did you know that?" asked a bewildered Lenihan.  
  
"Err, I don't want to tell you" she responded blushing slightly.  
  
****  
  
The prone figures of Amy and Kif lay upon his bed, still entangled together, in their kiss.  
  
The sound of something hitting the floor above them got their attention, followed by the muffled shout of " Fry's with Zapp! In a Steam Room! Oh My God! I've got to rescue him!" and the fading sound of someone running at speed.  
  
Kif broke from Amy, "Did I hear right, I thought Leela went with Zapp."  
  
"Err, yeah, there's something I'm not meant to tell you, but I think this will cheer you up."  
  
"OK, but you being here has done that already"  
  
"Aww, thanks, this will make you laugh though. Zapp is probably attempting to get Fry into bed with him."  
  
"How? Him and Leela walked past us in the landing bay and headed for the bridge"  
  
"It's kind of complicated, but sometime yesterday, Leela and Fry's minds somehow switched bodies."  
  
"Uh? So you're saying telling me that Leela is Fry and Fry is Leela?"  
  
"Yeah, and the only people who know are them, you and I."  
  
"Zapp doesn't know and hasn't realized yet? Oh boy, how I wish I could see what was happening", he struggled to say through fits of giggling.  
  
"I told you that it was funny, but you must never tell Zapp that you know, otherwise Leela will kill me."  
  
"OK, I'll try and do that for you, but I'm not going to be able to look him straight in the face again, without remembering what you just told me".  
  
"Yeah, I can imagine", as she lowered her mouth onto his and started to continue like the interruption had never happened.  
  
****  
  
Fry/Leela walked through the doors in front of him, straight into a thick fog of steam.  
  
He looked around him; he couldn't see a damn thing in front of him,  
  
"Jeez! Sure is humid in this part of the ship!" He said out loud, looking around to find the door or some vent to release some of the steam in the corridor.  
  
He heard the door close behind him; he turned around but saw no one.  
  
Zapp smirked to himself as he silently closed the door to the changing rooms,  
  
"By the time the lovely Leela figures out what's going on I'll be wearing naught but a towel and she won't be able to help herself" he thought to himself.  
  
Fry/Leela stumbled round the room.  
  
"Hmm perhaps Zapp thinks I'm a little tense and is trying to get me to relax a little" he thought to himself "yeah right, any second now he's gonna appear and try and get into Leela's pants…MY pants!"  
  
Fry/Leela shuddered to himself, "well he's got no chance there", he thought,  
  
He felt himself gasping for air, the sweat was pouring out of her now, and her chest was beginning to feel heavy.  
  
"Man it sure is hot in here" thought Fry/Leela to himself.  
  
He felt himself falling, dizziness almost taking him by surprise.  
  
"Whoaaa!" He exclaimed, "I think I just about fainted there.   
  
"So? Zapp would call for a medic and I'd get out of here!"  
  
A second voice piped up in the back of his mind, one that sarcastically said, "yeah Zapp's gonna come in here and find you, in Leela's body, unconscious and the first thing he's gonna do is call for a doctor… I don't think so"   
  
"OK!" Thought Fry/Leela, trying to be as rational as he could in the overpowering heat and humidity, "It looks like the only way to escape from here with Leela's honor intact and her, My, body unmolested is for me to get out of some of these clothes before I faint"  
  
Fry/Leela began to get undressed, until he was wearing only the small but sensible white panties he put on earlier.  
  
Laying Leela's clothes in a neat pile nearby to prevent them getting creased, he took a towel off a nearby rack and proceeded to lay down on it in his stomach, partly because it was comfortable partly because it helped get his mind of the two large pieces of soft, warm and pert pieces of female flesh that were constantly in his field of vision, when he was standing.  
  
Fry/Leela lay there for a few minutes, relaxing in the heat, after pouring water over the hot synthetic coals.  
  
He was just about to close her eye and doze off when he heard a door open.  
  
Fry/Leela snapped his head up and looked on in abject horror as Zapp appeared like a bloated towel adorned apparition through the thick steamy atmosphere.  
  
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!" shrieked Fry/Leela getting up and running for the door.  
  
Something was going off in Fry/Leela's head like and alarm bell.  
  
He looked down and saw something that in other circumstances would have made him smile from ear to ear; however his reaction now was quite different.  
  
"EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK!"  
  
Fry/Leela glanced at Zapp who was by now moving towards him with a smug look on his face.  
  
"MMMMMMMM candy!" said Zapp, lunging forward  
  
"Dream on fatboy!" spat Fry with a tone that reminded him of the real Leela, as he pushed Zapp backward onto the hot coals, and covered himself with his other arm.  
  
"YEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWW" yelled Zapp as the coals set fire to his towel.  
  
Fry/Leela reached the door and finding it locked proceeded to bang against it with his one free fist.  
  
"LEEEELAAAAA! HEEELLP MEEEEE!" he yelled.  
  
Fry/Leela pummeled at the door for a few more seconds.  
  
"What the hell am I doing?" He thought, suddenly, "she's gonna be on the other side of the ship, she'll never hear me"   
  
Fry/Leela felt himself start to panic, his rate of breathing increasing significantly,  
  
"OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! I'm Trapped, semi-naked in Leela's body, in a sauna with Captain Lothario here and I just about set fire to the only thing he's wearing" thought Fry/Leela, glancing at Zapp who was now attempting to perch precariously on top of the small water trough in the corner of the room and douse his toasted posterior.  
  
Fry/Leela's eye went wide in horror when he saw that the towel was know lying on the bench next to Zapp.  
  
For an instant his mind went off on a tangent, back to another incident in a steam room.  
  
"Hey, Amy and Leela must have been lying about the wonders of genetic engineering, unless small is wonderful nowadays."  
  
Fry/Leela suddenly remember exactly what he was looking at and looked away in disgust.  
  
"EEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWW!"  
  
****  
  
"Hey skintubes, quit talking, get working, this needs be delivered, today" ordered Bender.  
  
Both Lenihan and Adaoye had a bemused look on their faces, before rushing into the room, and between them started to push the old bed towards the doors.  
  
"Bender, please help" asked a red-faced Adaoye.  
  
"Yeah, this bed is too heavy for us humans to move on our own" sarcastically added Lenihan.  
  
"It's always us robots that do the work, you losers are worse than useless in comparison" answered Bender as he pushed both the Lieutenants out of the way. Then shoving the bed into the corridor, before turning and pushing the Cargo Dolly into the room and unloaded and unpacked the new bed. Adaoye rushed up and pulled the plastic covering off the bed, before leaping onto Bender and giving him a Big Hug.  
  
"You my hero" she said before planting a kiss on him.  
  
"Jeez girl, leave me alone, I'm a Robot" said Bender once he'd managed to unfasten Adaoye from him and help her to the floor  
  
"Mr. Bender, I suggest you go help the lovely Leela with the idiots, before she accidentally dismantles you" said Lenihan with a touch of concern in his voice and pointing at Adaoye.  
  
"I not hurt my love" defiantly answered Adaoye.  
  
"MY LOVE?!?, This is worse than having my Butt shielded" thought Bender   
  
"Yeah, I guess you're right Skirt Boy!" a worried sounding Bender replied, as he backed out of the room, turned and started to run down the corridor.  
  
"Where you going?" shouted Adaoye, as she set off after him, narrowly evading Lenihan's hand shooting out in an attempt to grab her arm and stop her.  
  
"Well, looks like I'LL have stay here and guard the room" declared Lenihan to himself.  
  
The numerous intersecting corridors, doorways and staircases of The Nimbus went past in a blur as Bender raced through the ship, trying to locate the Bridge, while at the same time trying to lose Lt. Adaoye.  
  
"For a human, she certainly has impressive energy" he said to himself, after looking behind him for the umpteenth time, and seeing the now familiar figure following him like a shadow. He rounded another corner, and spotted a cleaning cupboard to his right. He quickly pressed the open button, he leaping in just as soon as the door had opened high enough, and then pressed the close button.  
  
Bender stood in the dark, silently, listening, hoping that he'd fooled Adaoye.  
  
A brief period of time after the door had shut; Adaoye rounded the corner, and stopped. "Where he go?" she pondered, before shooting off down the corridor towards the next intersection.  
  
After looking left and seeing nothing, she looked right and saw a door closing. "He's trying to hide from me" she thought, before as silently as she could started to walk towards the door.  
  
After hearing footsteps recede into the distance, Bender pressed the open button and stuck his head through the opening door, and then quickly withdrew it as he saw Adaoye had stopped at the intersection. After a few seconds, he dared to have another look, and saw that she had gone, quickly he left the room, and ran back up the corridor, still in fear that he hadn't lost her.  
  
Lt. Adaoye approached the door, and pressed the open button, before walking in.  
  
"You can't hide from me!" she said on entering, before stopping in horror, as the semi-naked body of Lt. Paris, turned to look at her.  
  
"Why would I hide from YOU!" he spat out, while twirling his hand near his blonde hair.  
  
"I, thought you someone else, sorry" she stutteringly responded, before backing out of the room, and quickly turned right back the way she came.  
  
"Women, can't live with them, can't live without them" said Lt. Paris to himself, once had the room to himself.  
  
"I lost my love!" she disappointedly said to herself, before heading towards her quarters for some peace, quiet and solace.  
  
After running and constantly looking behind him, Bender eventually found his way to the Bridge.  
  
****  
  
Leela/Fry raced through the labyrinth like corridors of the Nimbus, following the signs for the ship's steam room.  
  
She heard the thudding on the door, and the muffled yells of Fry in her voice.  
  
"Fry! Fry!" yelled Leela/Fry, before realizing her mistake, "Leela its Fry, stand back" she added!  
  
Fry/Leela heard Leela's voice from the other side of the door and took a step back.  
  
Leela/Fry kicked the door down, and was met with the sight of Fry/Leela grinning inanely with relief, lunging towards her, wearing only the pair of conservative white panties he'd put on earlier.  
  
"WHAT THE HELL!!" yelled Leela/Fry pushing Fry/Leela away.  
  
"Lee…Fry… Darling, its not what you think," said Fry/Leela, before realizing just how bad that sounded given his current attire.  
  
He saw the angry glare in Leela/Fry's eyes. "She might not forgive me for this" he thought panicking,  
  
Fry/Leela opened her mouth and hoped for the best  
  
"HELOCKEDMEINANDITWASHOTANDIHADTOTAKETHECLOTHSOFFTOSTOPMEFROMFAINTINGORI'DHAVEBEENHELPLESS", spat Fry/Leela  
  
Leela/Fry looked at Fry/Leela and saw the desperation in her eye; "He's terrified! He thinks that he's let me down" she thought.  
  
She noticed Zapp's ample form teetering on the water trough; a look of blissful relief on his face, his blistered buttocks immersed deep in the liquid.  
  
She tried hard to stifle her laughter.  
  
Zapp looked up and saw Leela/Fry holding Fry/Leela away from her.  
  
"Oh, I hope I've not caused any trouble for you and the pip-squeak, Leela" said Zapp, smugly, his voice quivering slightly with pain.  
  
Leela/Fry looked at Zapp and pulled Fry/Leela to him, locking her lips on his and holding her tight.  
  
Fry/Leela's eye went wide, with shock!  
  
Leela/Fry felt Fry/Leela relax into the embrace, and then felt her hand gently cup his buttock, she made a slight noise, and opened his eyes and looked at Fry/Leela's eye, now shut in blissful delight.  
  
She looked at Zapp who was staring at the sight of 'Leela' groping 'Fry' on the ass, wide eyed.  
  
"NOOOOOOOOOOOO!" he shrieked before losing his balance and toppling off his perch on the water trough and landing on his burnt buttocks, "GAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!"  
  
Leela/Fry then placed her hand on Fry/Leela's buttock, making sure that Zapp got a good look.  
  
Leela/Fry broke off the kiss, "No trouble" she said caustically, before adding "and you're really not in any position to call anyone pip-squeak yourself Zapp."  
  
She then looked at Fry/Leela, she couldn't help but smile at the faraway, contented, glazed look her face had.  
  
She picked up Zapp's singed towel and held it up. "OK Leela" she said "You can get dressed again"  
  
"What about me?" asked Zapp.  
  
"What about you?" asked Leela/Fry, smugly.  
  
"I need to cover myself up to get my uniform from the other room" replied Zapp  
  
Leela/Fry put his hand into a jacket pocket.  
  
She pulled out a tiny crumpled but unused handkerchief and handed it to Zapp, "That should more than cover it!" he said.  
  
Fry/Leela sniggered slightly as she finished getting dressed.  
  
Zapp took the handkerchief grudgingly and crept out the steam room.  
  
Fry/Leela looked at Leela/Fry once Zapp had left,  
  
"Leela I'm soo sorry for what happened," he said, her voice low and surprisingly sincere, her eye meeting his eyes, "I didn't know what else to do, If it will make you feel better you can hit me or something!" he continued hanging her head and closing her eye  
  
"It's OK, Fry you're a man, you're not used to that kind of situation," said Leela/Fry  
  
"No, Leela it's not OK! I was vulnerable, I let you down, and I know how much you regret what happened with Zapp. I could never have forgiven myself if something had happened, course I'd probably need years of therapy too, but I knowing I'd betrayed you would be much worse" said Fry/Leela  
  
Leela/Fry looked at Fry/Leela, his voice took on a firm yet kind tone, "Fry, its alright, I forgive you, I mean you set Zapp's ass on fire, how can I be mad at you after seeing that"  
  
She smiled at him; she saw the guilt he was feeling lift and he managed a soft smile.  
  
"Now come on we've got to get to the bridge and get this transaction completed" she went on.  
  
****  
  
A short time later Leela/Fry and Fry/Leela approached the bridge of the nimbus, the smell of chemicals hung in the air and made the backs of their throat smart.  
  
The last of the fumigation detail where leaving the bridge as they entered, four of the fumigation crew where carrying Zapp's captains chair out of the bridge. It was wrapped in a thick plastic hermetically sealed bag, emblazoned with the words "Biohazard," and "Danger - Category 5 Crotch Lice contamination", while another two were bringing in the replacement chair.  
  
Both shuddered uneasily, Leela/Fry turned and looked at Fry/Leela.  
  
"Um Zapp didn't touch you in the steamroom? Did he? " An air of concern in his voice.  
  
"Well I pushed him but he didn't touch me as such, so no, your not infested" answered Fry guessing what Leela was getting at and giving her that weird one-eyed wink look he'd used earlier.   
  
"Though I think I did bruise my...your eye running from him" said, Fry/Leela with a wry smirk   
  
Leela/Fry gave him a look.  
  
Fry/Leela's expression changed to one of slight embarrassment.   
  
"Sorry!" she said "It's just that I've never seen, eh, uh...them, up that close, I nearly fell over myself, I mean, their the best ones I've ever seen, soo big and round and...Uh, I'll shut up now OK?" as she noticed the menacing looking furrowed brows on Leela/Fry's face.  
  
"Yeah Fry! Shut up!" said Leela/Fry sternly  
  
"Sorry" mumbled Fry/Leela despondently.  
  
Leela/Fry looked around the bridge after they had stood there for a short while before she turned and looked at herself.   
  
"Where the hell is everyone? We better go and get Zapp, and get this delivery completed and get out of here!"  
  
She noticed the sudden look of horror and abject fear on Fry/Leela's face at the mention of going to get Zapp.  
  
"OK I'll go get Zapp" he said   
  
"Thanks" said a very relieved Fry/Leela "I don't want to take this body anywhere near him"  
  
"You and me both!" said Leela/Fry giving Fry/Leela a brief smile before setting off back towards the Steam room changing rooms.  
  
****  
  
She found herself back at the men's changing rooms a short while later.  
  
Leela/Fry gingerly entered the outer room and opened the door to the main changing room; Zapp sat opposite him with his back facing him, his head bowed and his hands busy with something in his lap.  
  
Leela/Fry watched aghast as Zapp groaned slightly, and his head lolled back. She was about to leave in a hurry when Zapp placed a small tube of cream on the bench next to him.  
  
Leela/Fry shuddered to himself slightly before coughing to announce his presence in the room.  
  
Zapp looked around and on recognizing Leela/Fry gave her a derisory look before turning his gaze forward again.   
  
"What do you want hairpile!" snapped Zapp.  
  
"Leela needs you on the bridge to complete the delivery" said Leela/Fry.  
  
"Ah she NEED's ME!" said Zapp with a smirk.  
  
"She just needs your signature, I got everything else covered" replied Leela/Fry trying her best to give a reply Fry would use.  
  
"I'll wait outside for you" said Leela/Fry anxious to avoid the site of Zapp getting dressed and avoid being asked to help him get his girdle back on.  
  
A few minutes later Zapp exited the changing rooms, Leela/Fry was doing a pretty good impression of fry nonchalantly leaning against the corridor wall whistling.  
  
"Finally your dressed!" said Leela/Fry, "Still I suppose you gotta be careful, that girdle must take a lot of punishment."  
  
"Can it! Hairball," snapped Zapp "Or I'll have you thrown in the brig!"  
  
"Eeep!" thought Leela/Fry, "I 'm not me anymore, I can get away with saying that sort of thing to Zapp, he thinks I'm Fry, If I got thrown in the brig who'd protect Fry? And my body" she added almost as an after thought.  
  
As they neared the bridge Leela/Fry began to make out the sound of her own voice.  
  
"Oh dear god, what's Fry up to now?" she thought to herself.  
  
"Uh Zapp! I think I heard a woman calling your name from down that corridor!" said Leela/Fry Hastily to distract Zapp for a moment and allow her to enter the bridge before him  
  
"What! Where?" said Zapp with a broad lecherous grin on his face.  
  
"Down that corridor to the left there" said Leela/Fry  
  
"It must be one of those nurses come back for some more...uh tell the lovely Leela I'll be with her shortly, I have some 'candy' to catch" said Zapp as he strutted off down the corridor like a cockerel round a barnyard.  
  
"Sucker!" said Leela/Fry quietly to herself.  
  
She entered the bridge and saw Fry/Leela standing in the middle of the floor in front of where Zapp's chair should have sat.  
  
"Captain's Log! Supplemental, Stardate 3002.17.09.15:30. After placing the ship in orbit round the planet Xunil 4, I have discovered that..."  
  
"Fry!" snapped Leela quietly  
  
"Whoa!" exclaimed Fry/Leela startled, spinning round to face her.  
  
Fry/Leela went to place a hand on the railing separating the viewscreen from the main section of the bridge and maintain any semblance of dignity he had left; unfortunately he missed and fell length in a classic Chaplinesque pratfall.  
  
"I'm OK!" He yelled, getting up quickly! Trying to regain his composure  
  
"You won't be!" Hissed Leela/Fry grabbing hold of him by the straps on her white tank top   
  
At that moment Zapp walked into the Bridge.  
  
Fry/Leela saw Zapp over Leela/Fry's shoulder and kissed him full on the lips whilst grabbing his hands with hers and placing them suggestively on her body.  
  
Leela/Fry let out a surprised yelp before noticing Zapp out of the corner of his eyes and then relaxed into the charade.  
  
Fry/Leela eventually broke off the kiss, a hint of reluctance on her face.  
  
"Oh Zapp! I didn't see you there" she said smugly, giving Leela/Fry a cheeky grin as she patted his butt and conspicuously mouthing "LOVE YOU" at her, before walking over to Zapp   
  
"Fry's playing his role to the full and he loves every second of it" thought Leela/Fry  
  
"My Zapp! Have you put on even more weight?" asked Fry/Leela  
  
"Uh...eh Maybe!" stammered Zapp taken aback.  
  
"Why not ask Fry here for some work out tips" said Fry/Leela pointing at Leela/Fry "he's in excellent shape, why sometimes he keeps me up all night!"  
  
Both Zapp and Fry/Leela looked at Leela/Fry who was standing a few feet away  
  
Leela/Fry grinned back at them.  
  
"Your sooooo dead Fry!" mouthed Leela/Fry at Fry/Leela once Zapp had looked away shaking his head at this turn of events.  
  
Fry/Leela grinned back, enjoying his fleeting moment of power as much as he could.  
  
"Any way let's get this delivery finalized, I just need you to sign here" said Fry/Leela producing the PE delivery docket and laying it out on a nearby worktop.  
  
"Uhhh sure" said Zapp still slightly unnerved by Leela's behavior. Just let me call on Kif to witness it.  
  
****  
  
"Kif Kroeker to the Bridge" boomed out from the ship communicator speaker, just above Amy's Head.  
  
Amy opened her eyes and looked down at Kif, and then released her grasp on his back, and sat up on the bed. Kif got up off the bed and headed towards his mirror, so that he could get his uniform straightened out.  
  
"Aie ye! Are we ever going to get this finished?" an angry looking Amy asked.  
  
"The buffoon needs me for some reason, I have to go." as he headed for the door. Just as he got there, Amy jumped off the bed and grabbed his hand tightly.  
  
"Now WE ARE ready to see him" she said, after pressing the door control panel.  
  
"You're coming as well" inquired Kif his voice shaking a little.  
  
"Well, I'm not going to stay in your cabin and I've nothing else to do, plus I want to see how Leela and Fry are doing" as she half dragged him out of the room.  
  
"Plus I want to let Captain Brannigan know what I think of his treatment of my Kiffy"  
  
"Oh OK" he replied slightly uncertain as he stretched back and hit the lock door button.  
  
After walking along numerous corridors, they entered the Bridge and stood next to Zapp.  
  
"Kif Kroeker reporting as ordered"  
  
"Ah, you're finally here, just in time to see me sign this document with a flourish" Zapp replied as he raised his pen and then stopped.  
  
"What's wrong, we've delivered the bed" said Fry/Leela.  
  
"Not quite, if you read the small print, it's required to have a thorough testing prior to my acceptance" answered Zapp with a glint of excitement in his eyes.  
  
"Uh, what?" answered a shocked Fry/Leela as she grabbed the paperwork, and started to read with Leela/Fry looking over her shoulder.  
  
"Kif, go and get my NEW bed ready for action" ordered Zapp, while sneaking a sly look at Fry/Leela.  
  
"Unnngh!... Yes Captain" came the despondent response as he turned towards the door.  
  
"Kiffy, I know he's your Captain, but you are not his slave" Amy said stretching out an arm, and grabbing hold of his hand.  
  
"But he gave me an order" came the nervous response as he turned to face her.  
  
"That's not the kind of order a Captain should give" she replied while quickly looking at Leela/Fry, hoping for a nod of confirmation. Leela/Fry turned towards Fry/Leela and appeared to whisper something in her ear.  
  
"Amy, stay out of this, it's none of your business" ordered Fry/Leela.  
  
"He's my boyfriend and you are agreeing with this buffoon! Spleesh!" responded Amy angrily, as she thrust a finger into Zapp's flabby midriff.  
  
"Amy calm down, this is between Zapp and Kif" came the response from Leela/Fry, who looked shocked at her reaction.  
  
"He treats Kif like a piece of garbage! If he won't stand up for himself, I'll do it" shouted Amy venomously as she forcibly jabbed her balled up fist into Zapp, making him to take an involuntary step backwards, towards his chair.  
  
"Oof, that hurt" gasped Zapp as he patted the area of impact.  
  
"Amy, please calm down, I know you love me and care for me, but he's my captain" meekly said Kif.  
  
"Kif, unless something is done, he'll keep on walking all over you, and I don't want a doormat for a future husband, you don't deserve that." replied Amy as she turned to face him, her eyes wide with anger.  
  
"Me!? your husband!" stuttered Kif as he looked bewildered by this revelation, colour starting to drain from him as his camouflage reaction started.  
  
"You and him, married, I've more chance with Leela" interjected a chuckling Zapp.  
  
"You've no chance, Fry is the only one for me" responded Fry/Leela, while avoiding the astonished stare from Leela/Fry.  
  
Amy spun away from the now partially invisible Kif, took one step towards Zapp and before anyone could stop her, she pushed him so hard, that he toppled backwards over the Captain's Chair, landing on his head and knocking him senseless.  
  
"Amy!?...wh!...wha!... why did you do that?" spluttered Fry/Leela after a few seconds of shocked silence had past.  
  
"I know, I just got so angry, I couldn't stop myself" she replied, her cheeks now red with shame instead of anger.  
  
"Guess we'd better help him, he looks seriously hurt" a shocked Leela/Fry said.  
  
"Amy, I hope you never do that again" said Kif  
  
"I won't, I just ...." she replied as she broke down in tears. The re-materialising Kif walked up to her and gently wrapped his arms, around her body and gave her a comforting hug.  
  
Leela and Fry walked round the chair and made a couple of valiant attempts to lift Zapp's unconscious body off the floor.  
  
"Sheesh, he is heavy, glad he ain't my brother" said Fry/Leela  
  
"I think we're going to need that Cargo Dolly again, you'd better order Bender to get it, Amy and Kif are in no position to help at the moment" he whispered  
  
"Bender, go and get the dolly, so that we can move Zapp to somewhere else"  
  
"Yeah, like the disposal unit" responded Bender with a mock salute   
  
"Looking at that cut, he's going to need a Hospital, we should take him back to Earth." said Leela/Fry.  
  
"What about the Nimbus's sick bay?" enquired Fry/Leela  
  
"Well it would have all the equipment to attend to Zapp", replied Kif, "But the nurses refuse to treat him after the, erm... crotch lice ointment application incident" added Kif uncomfortably.  
  
"Riiiggghhht!" said Fry/Leela with a bemused look on her face.  
  
"So it would be best if you could take him back to earth with you" said Kif   
  
"Yeah, so you going to stay here and captain The Nimbus?" asked a hopeful Fry/Leela, looking at Leela/Fry.  
  
"No I'm not, Kif is captain now, I think!" came the forceful response.  
  
"Captain Kif! That has a nice ring to it" said Amy as she looked up from his shoulder.  
  
****  
  
Bender approached the door to the bridge with some trepidation, the thought of a rampant Lt. Adaoye waiting beyond filled his circuits with fear.  
  
"Bender, why haven't you left the bridge yet?" asked Fry/Leela, as she looked up from the injured form of Zapp.  
  
"I'm being quiet, so as not to disturb the idiot" responded Bender.  
  
"You look like you're in fear of the door to me" shot back Leela/Fry  
  
"Yeah, there's a female DOOP Officer out there, who can't keep her hands off me" came back the unusually shameful reply.  
  
"Bender's Got A Girlfriend!" sang Fry/Leela before a hand whacked him across the cheek.  
  
"Oops, it looks like Fry just hit me." thought Leela/Fry to herself.  
  
"Why did you hit me, Lee .. err Fry?" asked Fry/Leela as he rubbed her cheek  
  
"Sorry, forgot who I was for a second" truthfully replied Leela/Fry  
  
"Jeez, you two are more screwed up than that Lieutenant is, still thinking you're each other!" yelled back Bender, as he stretched his arm towards the door panel and then instantly withdrew it.  
  
"You open the door for him, Fry" ordered Fry/Leela to Leela/Fry.  
  
"OK, I'll help the Big Brave Robot open the door" came the sarcastic response as he stepped forward and pressed the open door button on the panel.  
  
"Bender, go and get the Cargo Dolly, NOW!" ordered Fry/Leela while pointing to the open door.  
  
"That's the Leela I know, back to yourself" said Bender as he slowly shuffled to the door, stuck his head out for a quick look, then with no sign of Adaoye, he ran out the bridge and down the corridor.  
  
"Nicely Done, I thought that was me for a second" Leela/Fry whispered to Fry/Leela after walking over to her.  
  
"I thought I was you for a second " she responded in a whisper.  
  
"Maybe this swap is having after effects, you could end up with parts of my personality and vice-versa" Leela/Fry whispered back  
  
"Cooool!" responded Fry/Leela out aloud.  
  
"That's not what I meant, and keep your voice down" a severe whisper came back.  
  
"Leela, Fry instead of standing there whispering, can you check on Zapp, please" asked Kif.  
  
"How's Amy?" asked Leela/Fry as they bent down to check on Zapp.  
  
"I'm OK, I'm in Kif's arms." she responded through tear stained eyes as she looked up to face them.  
  
****  
  
Lt. Adaoye got up off her bed and wandered around her room for the umpteenth time, then sat down again and placed her head in her hands.  
  
"I lost Bender, I not know what to do!" she said to herself  
  
"Lt. Adaoye, report for guard duty outside the Captain's Quarters" a voice ordered over the intercom.  
  
"I going now" she yelled at the microphone on the wall, as she passed it on her way out of the door.  
  
"I think they heard you say that back at Head Quarters on Earth" came the sarcastic response, to a now empty room.  
  
"Lt. Linehan your partner will be with you shortly, she's on her way and seems a bit steamed." the intercom informed him.  
  
"You're sending me Lt. Adaoye, again. She left here chasing after the Planet Express robot, a Mr. Bender."  
  
"She was guarding the room and left her duty?"  
  
"No, we were moving the Captain's new bed into his room at the time."  
  
"That's OK then. She'll be with you shortly."  
  
Bender raced down the corridor, his threat assessment circuits buzzing with activity, his radar systems scanning ahead and behind constantly.  
  
He rounded the last corner before the Lovenasium and saw Lt Lenihan standing outside the door.  
  
"Hey Skirt Boy what are you still doing here?" asked Bender  
  
"I'm guarding the Buffoons quarters! Whats it look like, you rusty bucket of bolts!" replied Lt Lenihan causticly  
  
"Ohhh Touché!" replied Bender "You know I could get to like you kid"   
  
"Yeah well pity you aint gonna have the time" said Lt Lenihan "Lt Adeoye is on her way back here right now"  
  
"AWWW CRAP!" exclaimed Bender half in fear, half in irritation.  
  
He then grabbed cargo dolly and ran hell for leather back the way he had come, his metal limbs flailing wildly as he propelled himself and the dolly through the myriad of corridors of the Nimbus.  
  
His onboard sensors picked up a rapidly approaching signal, one that matched a profile he'd created earlier, one that struck fear into his circuits.  
  
"OOOOOOOOOOOH GOD! ITS HER!" He thought.  
  
Bender glanced around himself panic stricken.  
  
Finding no where to hide, he stopped the dolly and leapt on to it. Then he retracted his arms legs and head into his body giving the appearance of a plain ordinary container and certainly not the object of Lt Adaoye's desires.  
  
Bender remained in his Compact mode till long after the signal had ceased. He gingerly popped his head out of his body just far enough for his eyes to scan 360° to check the coast was clear.  
  
"Ok Gotta be fast!" said Bender, concerned that Lt Adaoye would return. With that he leapt off the dolly and high tailed it back towards the bridge.  
  
Lt Adaoye arrived at Zapp's quarters and was greeted by a bemused Lt Lenihan.  
  
"Glad to see you could make it" he said sarcastically  
  
"I sorry I was looking for Bender" she replied   
  
"Oh? Well you just missed him!" said Lenihan.  
  
"What! OH MY GOD! I MUST CATCH HIM!" she exclaimed   
  
Adaoye began to spin round to leave when Lenihan deftly grabbed her by the shoulder and with his other hand pinched her nose in a near perfect demonstration of the Arcturain Kung-Fu sleeping nose pinch.  
  
Lt Adaoye sighed softly before crumpling to the floor unconscious.  
  
"Yes, I truly think Leela would have been proud of that one herself" said Lenihan smugly to no one in particular.   
  
Fry, Leela, Kif, and Amy stood over the prone form of Zapp when the Bridges doors began to open before being smashed to pieces as Bender barrelled the hover dolly through the door.  
  
"That woman is unstoppable I tell you" yelled Bender.  
  
"What woman?" chorused Leela, Fry, Amy and Kif, looking through the gaping hole.  
  
"That Adaoye woman, she won't stop chasing me. I had to turn turtle and hide from her."  
  
"Well at least you got the Dolly here, now what do we do with Zapp, we've no room on the ship", said Leela/Fry  
  
"Unless you chuck him in the Cargo Hold", said the returning Bender pushing the Dolly carelessly into Zapp, then throwing his hands in the air, when there was no response from the prone Zapp.  
  
"Hey, I've an idea" said Amy  
  
"What?" asked Leela/Fry.  
  
"Kiffy, can find somewhere for me to sleep, then I could move out of my cabin, and stay here with Kif, while you transport Zapp to Earth."  
  
"I don't know if that's a good idea Amy", the new temporary Captain answered.  
  
"Aww, pwease Kiffy" she answered giving him her best sad puppy look.  
  
"Hoo, heh heh, I'll see what I can do" he answered while attempting to suppress his nerves.  
  
Amy leaned forward and gave him a quick kiss on the cheek "I knew you were the right man for me" she said, blinking her eyes rapidly at him.  
  
"OK, that's that then, Amy stays with Kif" said Fry/Leela before Leela/Fry could say anything in disagreement.  
  
"Let's get the out-of-it fatso, to the ship then" mentioned Bender, as he hauled Zapp's insensible carcass unceremoniously onto the cargo dolly, then started to push it towards the smashed bridge doors.  
  
Everyone watched Bender carelessly shove the dolly and Zapp through the remains of the doors, adding a few more bumps to Zapp's head in the process.  
  
Leela, Fry and Amy followed the robot down through the Nimbus's main carridors and walkways towards the docking bays.   
  
They gave the occasional flinch as Bender played Bumper cars with the Dolly, Zapp's head and the corridor doors and walls.  
  
"Shouldnt we tell Bender to be more careful with Zapp?" said Fry/Leela  
  
"Nah!" came the response with mischievous glint in Leela/Fry's eyes.  
  
After a short time longer, which saw Bender managing to catch Zapps head between 3 sets of elevator doors and collide with several more immovable objects the group finally entered Docking Bay 5 and saw the comforting site of the PE ship.   
  
"My work here is done, off to get some booze" said Bender leaving the Cargo Dolly at the bottom of the steps and then started up them into the Planet Express ship.  
  
"Err, Bender you forgot something" yelled Leela/Fry after him pointing at the inert form of Zapp on the Dolly.  
  
"Like what? To give you your proper brain back?" came the muffled response from above.  
  
"He knows!" whispered Fry/Leela to Leela/Fry.  
  
"No, he knows something is wrong, but doesn't know what, we'll have to be more careful in front of him" she whispered back.  
  
"G'uh, why are you two whispering, me and Kiffy already know what happened, and Bender isn't anywhere near" remarked Amy from just behind them.  
  
Both Leela and Fry spun around to face Amy at speed.  
  
"You've told Kif?" asked an exasperated Leela/Fry.  
  
"Well, I had to, he needed cheering up and I thought it might make him laugh" she nervously answered  
  
"What did you tell him?"  
  
"Just that you two had swapped minds and that Zapp was possibly trying get Fry into bed"  
  
"OK, guess that would have amused him" came the response while sneaking a quick look at Fry/Leela's horrified face. "He won't tell anyone?" Leela/Fry continued  
  
"He said he won't and I believe him" defiantly answered Amy.  
  
"OK, now what do we do about Zapp?" asked Fry/Leela  
  
"Well, looks like we're going to have to move him. Fry you grab the legs, Amy you grab the head, I'll get the middle" ordered Leela/Fry.  
  
"B'uh, why don't we take him through the cargo hold on the Dolly, then we only need to lift him onto my bed" mentioned Amy.  
  
"Yeah, let's do that" answered Fry/Leela with a look of relief spreading across her face.  
  
"That is easier, don't know why I suggested the other way" said Leela/Fry  
  
"Maybe you wanted to show Fry what his body can do!" mischievously responded Amy.  
  
"Hey, it's not that bad, is it?" asked Fry/Leela, as Amy and Leela/Fry looked at each other and gave a knowing wink.  
  
"I'll push the Cargo Dolly to Amy's cabin with her help, while you go and make certain everything is in order on the Bridge" advised Leela/Fry.  
  
"That's my job moving cargo" came the slightly downhearted response.  
  
"I know, but we're still trying to fool Bender, remember" shot back Leela/Fry  
  
"OK, I forgot who I was for a second, don't know why though" came the response as Fry/Leela looked down towards the floor and then gently patted her bosom, before heading up the steps into the ship.  
  
"OK Amy, let's get the "Cargo" into the ship" as Leela/Fry motioned with his hand towards the Dolly.  
  
"You want me to push it?" asked a surprised Amy.  
  
"No, you lead the way and work the Cargo Hold door and lift, I'll push the Dolly" came the authoritative response.  
  
"If you want to keep fooling Bender, act more like Fry and not you" mentioned Amy as she walked towards the Cargo Hold doors.  
  
"I am acting like Fry, aren't I?" came the quizzical response.  
  
"Some of the time you are, but you talk like Leela and not like Fry"  
  
"I hadn't realised that, been getting used to two eyes and acting like him."  
  
"Guess it must seem funny still, looking at yourself without a mirror?"  
  
"It does, although hopefully I'll be me tomorrow and not Fry" Leela/Fry replied.   
  
"I hope we do switch back, this body is my biggest challenge ever!" she wistfully thought.  
  
"I think it's cute, you being Fry, it gives you a unique look at life" responded Amy "but it will be good to have you back to normal" she added quickly before Leela/Fry could shoot back a response.  
  
"OK, Amy enough of this conversation, let's get Zapp to your cabin" ordered Leela/Fry  
  
"Sure, no problem. I'll go and get to the controls for the Cargo Hold" as she noticed that Leela/Fry had pushed a jacket sleeve up and was looking for a couple of seconds with some bewilderment at a bare arm.  
  
****  
  
Fry/Leela walked into the bridge and sat down in the Captain's chair.  
  
"Now, what would Leela do?" he asked himself, before pressing a green button on the console in front of him. A faint clicking noise from behind, briefly caught his attention, but was forgotten almost as quick.  
  
"Aww Crud, what did I press!" he said to himself, before noticing just above the button was a label saying "ICS".   
  
"Wonder what ICS means?" he contemplated for a second or two, before he spun the chair around and stood up.  
  
"I'd better go and ask Leela" he said to himself, then walked to the Bridge Door, pressed the Open Button on the panel and looked surprised when it never opened.  
  
"Stupid Door, Open" yelled Fry/Leela at it, as he continued to push the button.  
  
****  
  
"OK Amy, you open the door." said Leela/Fry  
  
"Eye Eye Sir" she answered with a glint in her eyes as she pressed the open door button on the panel to her cabin.  
  
"Amy, you go in first, then we can get "it" lifted onto your bed" ordered Leela/Fry  
  
"OK" she responded and headed into her cabin, followed a couple of seconds later by Leela/Fry and the Dolly carrying Zapp.  
  
"Amy, you grab the legs, I'll grab his middle and then we'll push him onto your bed" ordered Leela/Fry "It's a pity the Dolly doesn't come with a tilt feature, then I could have dropped him onto the bed" a thought suddenly occurred.  
  
"I was going to pack some clothes for my stay on The Nimbus, while you did that" answered Amy from next to her wardrobe.  
  
"Normally, I would have tried, but not in this body!" came the caustic response, as she pointed at the flabby gut.  
  
"Shall I call Bender?" asked Amy as she walked over to the Dolly.  
  
"No I think we can manage this, just push his legs and hopefully he'll roll onto the bed" answered Leela/Fry as she started to push Zapp forward.  
  
"I'll take the Dolly back to the Cargo Bay and then check on Fry, while you start to pack for your stay" ordered a slightly out of breath Leela/Fry after they'd got Zapp onto Amy's bed.  
  
"You look like you need a rest, not more work" remarked Amy.  
  
"I'll go slowly, you be careful, I don't trust Zapp" came the response as Leela/Fry left the room.  
  
"Sp'luh, he's unconscious, what can he do?" retorted Amy as she turned back towards her wardrobe.  
  
"Hey skintube, where did you dump the carcass?" asked Bender waving a beer bottle at the empty Dolly, as he met Leela/Fry outside Fry's Cabin.  
  
"We got Zapp to Amy's cabin." came the response.  
  
"Left him on the floor, did you?"   
  
"We got him onto the bed, without your help" came the cynical response. "Oops, that was me and not Fry responding, I've got to be more careful in front of Bender"  
  
"Fry, you're not impressing anyone by acting and talking like Leela, so give it up."  
  
"Sure buddy, I'm just not myself today"  
  
"That's right, you're not. I'm off to tell Leela that you're still mimicking her" as he turned and set off up the corridor.  
  
"Jeez, humans" as he approached Amy's cabin.   
  
"That was close, nearly gave us away. I'll have to be quick, I need to get to Fry before Bender." thought Leela/Fry, as she set off purposefully towards the cargo bay.  
  
"I've packed my suitcases, ready for my stay. Now I need to change out of my dress as it's dirty" Amy said to herself, wiping the smallest speck of dust off of her, before bending down and taking off her shoes. Throwing the "dirty" dress into her laundry basket, she bent down and opened a drawer at the bottom of the wardrobe.  
  
"Ooh, my head and where am I?" mumbled Zapp as he opened his eyes after coming round on Amy's bed.  
  
Sitting up and having a quick look around the room he espied a purple panty covered female buttocks facing him.  
  
"mmmm Candy" he thought as he quietly got off the bed and headed towards what he hoped wasn't an hallucination.  
  
Amy picked up the pants and top of her clean sweatsuit, placed them carefully on the floor and was closing the drawer, when she felt something smack her bottom.   
  
Instinctively she jerked her left leg backwards and upwards and was surprised when it connected with something.  
  
"Ooof, you kicked little Zapp and his buddies" came a familiar voice squealing in agony, before a fist connected with his face. He span across the room and thumped head first into the door, rendering him unconscious again.  
  
"You OK in there meatball, I heard .. wow!, you really don't like him!" said Bender as he walked in, and noticed the comatose form of Zapp.   
  
"Bender, put Zapp on my bed, while I get dressed" stated Amy, as she turned around and bent down to put on the sweatsuit pants and boots.  
  
"So, what happened, tell me all the gory details" ordered Bender as he hoisted Zapp onto the bed.  
  
"I was changing my clothes, when he patted my bottom, so I hit him" she answered  
  
"That's all, you humans are too sensitive a robot wouldn't care if you touched it's ass" came Bender's incredulous response.  
  
"Why would anyone want to touch your ass?" answered Amy as she zipped up her sweatsuit top and turned to face him.  
  
"I have fem-bots fainting when they see my ass" replied Bender with some pride.  
  
"You'll have to cut down on the beer then, that's probably the cause" replied Amy sarcasm lacing her voice, as she picked up the suitcases and headed out the door.  
  
****  
  
"ICS, now what do you do?" asked Fry/Leela to the button, after eventually giving up on the door and deciding to sit back in the Captain's chair.  
  
"Idiots Control Switch, I Can Save, Indigo Color Sky" went through Fry's mind as variations for what the letters meant.  
  
A loud knocking on the door and someone yelling his name, grabbed his attention.  
  
"Leela, that you" he yelled as he got out of the chair and ran to the door.  
  
"Open the door Fry, It won't open for me."  
  
"I can't, it won't open again."  
  
"What did you do this time?" asked Leela/Fry as she stood hands balled up on his hips in an authoritarian pose.  
  
"I pressed a button on the console, and know the doors won't open. The intermail system says "You had mail".  
  
"Which button did you press?"   
  
"I pressed a button labeled ICS, don't know what it did"  
  
"Now you're standing like Leela, I'm off back to my booze" said Bender as he walked up behind Leela/Fry, then turned around, thumped both hands against the side of his head in exasperation, and wandered down the corridor.   
  
"Bender, the door won't open, I'm waiting for Leela to finish" Leela/Fry yelled after him as if to explain what he'd seen.  
  
"You pressed the Inverse Control System button, everything on the bridge is reversed" she told Fry/Leela after turning back to face the door.  
  
"What do I do?"  
  
"Press the button again, everything should work normally then."  
  
"OK" he replied as her set off across the bridge and pressed the ICS button on the console, followed almost immediately by the sound of someone purposefully marching towards him.  
  
"I can't EVEN leave you alone FOR A COUPLE OF MINUTES WITHOUT YOU SCREWING UP!" yelled Leela/Fry at the top of his voice.  
  
"Leela .. err Fry, quit yelling like that, otherwise Bender will hear you" said Amy from the open doorway.  
  
"Amy, you keep out of this and get to The Nimbus before we leave with you" came the caustic response.  
  
"Spleesh Leela, if you want to fool Bender about what happened, then do this when you are you. Fry screws up all the time."  
  
"Hey, what do you mean?" responded a surprised Fry/Leela.  
  
"OK Amy, I'll calm down, just to stop Bender finding out, now you go and have a good time on The Nimbus" said Leela/Fry turning towards her.  
  
"Oh, I will, don't worry" she replied grinning from ear to ear, before disappearing from the open door.  
  
"Next time, look before you press any button. You could have pressed the Dark Matter Ejection System, then we'd have been stuck here" she declared to Fry/Leela.  
  
"OK, I'll try to be careful" he meekly replied  
  
"Now, go and sit back there, while I reverse us out of here" she ordered as she sat pointed Fry/Leela toward the back of the bridge while sitting down in her chair.  
  
"OK" as he trudged off   
  
"Planet Express Ship to Captain Kif, requesting permission to depart The Nimbus"  
  
"Permission granted and good luck with Zapp"   
  
"He'll be no problem, see you at Earth"  
  
Leela/Fry pressed the illuminated button marked "Main Engine Start" , then   
slowly moved the throttle control lever down to reverse power.  
  
The thrum from the engines began to change pitch and build in intensity to a whine.  
  
Slowly but surely, the ship edged backwards until it had cleared the Docking Bay doors, turning the ship to the left, she moved the throttle lever up to full power, then entered their destination into the autopilot.  
  
"It's been a long day, let's go to bed" he said after spinning the chair to face Leela/Fry.  
  
"You mean?" came the surprised response  
  
"Not that."  
  
"Oh!" as a brief look of excitement changed to abject disappointment.  
  
"I think it's best if you sleep in my cabin, and I sleep in yours, just in case we swap bodies again."   
  
"Leela, if we swap back, I'll miss these" she answered cupping the ample bosom protruding outwards.  
  
"FRY!" as she swung his hand around whacked him across the face, and stormed out of the bridge.  
  
"Leela, why did you do that?" as he followed, rubbing the spot where the hand had connected.  
  
"You can be really stupid at times, saying something like that to a woman is not a clever idea"   
  
"I need to teach him a lesson for that remark, but how?"  
  
"Sorry Leela" he responded the blushing of the cheeks enhancing the red hand mark.  
  
"You will be, now I know what the lesson will be!"  
  
****  
  
Captain Kif Kroeker and Amy walked through the myriad of corridors towards Zapp's Quarters.  
  
"Amy, I still don't think this right!...using Zapp's quarters" said Kif uneasily  
  
"Spleesh, you are the Captain, so you have to sleep in there, what will the rest of the crew think?" She replied  
  
"But, I'm not the real Captain"  
  
"Kif, while Zapp is out of action, you ARE the Captain, so you have to act like one"  
  
"Amy, I know you want the best for me, but ...." his voice trailing off as he noticed two young lieutenants, standing guard outside Zapp's Quarters.  
  
"Sir, Lieutenants Lenihan and Adaoye reporting" Lt. Lenihan said with a brisk salute.  
  
"Why are you two here and not on other duties?" queried Kif  
  
"With the injury to his fatness, we thought it best for us to guard his quarters" replied Lenihan  
  
"Well, my Captain Kiffy is here, so you can go" ordered Amy.  
  
"With all due respect Ma'am, 1st officer kroeker is the Captain, not you" was the brisk, but polite response  
  
"Amy, we're only going in, so you can look around, and then I'll find you some suitable quarters" said Kif as he leaned forward and typed in Zapp's pass code.  
  
"Kif, what do yo... Oh my" said Amy with a look of surprise as she noticed what lay beyond the double doors.  
  
Zapp's Quarters, otherwise known as the Lovenasium, to it's owner, was like entering through the doors of the plushest, yet somehow tackiest, suite on the top floor of the most expensive hotel in New New York. In front of Amy and Kif, was the new Heart-Shaped Multi-Sensory Bed, on the walls were pictures of the "great" man himself in various poses that were copies of classic art, including one that could only be described as 'Mona Zapp'.  
  
The gold surrounds to the pictures directly matched the candlesticks, goblets, medals and other paraphernalia that was scattered all over the shelves and table tops.   
  
The furnishing's were individually, of the finest quality and taste, yet grouped together as they had been by Zapp, the effect was hideous.  
  
On the roof directly above the bed, was a painting of Zapp's Greatest Conquest, when he finally made it with a woman in bed.  
  
"So Amy, you still think I ought to sleep in here?" asked Kif as placed one of Zapp's ill-gotten medals back onto a shelf.  
  
"Kiffy, this place is the best, and yes we should stay here tonight"  
  
"We?" a confused Kif replied, as a strapless bra, looped itself around his right ear.  
  
"If you turn around and look, you'll see what I mean" replied Amy with mischief lacing her voice.  
  
Kif slowly turned around to face Zapp's bed, and nearly fell over in shock at the sight of Amy lying naked on her stomach, feet pointing towards the ceiling, arms covering her breasts, as she looked expectantly up at him.  
  
"Amy, where are your clothes?" he stutteringly asked.  
  
"Well, you appear to be wearing my bra" she chuckled in a response before noticing that his face had gone a darker shade of green, before he started to fade out of sight, leaving his uniform apparently hanging in space..  
  
"Amy, I'm surprised at you, you don't need to do that for me" he responded, and turned so that his back faced Amy.  
  
"Kiffy, I didn't mean to embarrass you", she responded as she got off the bed, bent down and pulled her panties on.  
  
"Amy, I'm just not used to seeing women undressed"  
  
"I forgot that I'm your first girlfriend", she said as she rescued her bra from his ear, and then placed her left arm around his shoulders.  
  
"Amy, please get dressed again" he whispered.  
  
"Sure, I'll do it just for you" as she quickly kissed, then turned and went to get dressed.  
  
"I know you wanted it to be a nice surprise for me, but it wasn't necessary, I like you as you are." his voice wobbling with nerves.  
  
"That's sweet of you Kiffy, I'll try and remember that you are special"  
  
"Are you dressed yet? I want to leave this room, I can't stand the buffoon staring at me all the time, with that smirk on his face." looking down at the floor, in an effort to avoid the staring eyes from a painting of Zapp, before he started to fade back to his usual colour..  
  
"Nearly done, and it's my fault, I should never had suggested seeing this room" came the response as she fastened up her boots.  
  
"I still have to find you somewhere to sleep, my cabin isn't big enough for both of us"   
  
"You'll find me somewhere, as long as it's close to you, I'll be happy." as she walked up and grabbed Kif by the hand and headed for the doors.  
  
****  
  
"Fry, can you do something for me?" asked Leela/Fry as they stopped outside her cabin.  
  
"Yes, anything you want" came the response as her eye blinked rapidly in anticipation of something good happening.  
  
"My legs need waxing, it's been a couple of days since I last did them, and they could be getting unsightly"   
  
"Why are you worried? You keep them covered up all the time" he responded, while pulling the sides of the body hugging pants as proof.  
  
"A girl has to look her best all the time, it doesn't matter what she's wearing" came the curt response.  
  
"Ok, it can't be that hard, can it?"  
  
"Everything you need is in the bathroom cabinet, if you need help call me"  
  
"I can handle it, see you tomorrow" as he opened the door and walked in.  
  
"Hopefully, I'll be me and you'll be you" she wistfully responded and headed for Fry's cabin.  
  
Fry/Leela stood and stared at the immaculately clean room for a moment or two, "Wow, this place is spotless, I'd better be careful" he thought to himself and then headed into the bathroom.  
  
The lights in the ceiling of the bathroom sparkled off the metallic surrounds to the mirror, shower rail and faucets reminded Fry of what mess his bathroom was. "If I'm to stand a chance with Leela, I guess I'm going to have to get better and not be as untidy" he unhappily mused to himself as he opened the bathroom cabinet doors.  
  
A quick inspection of the cabinet, revealed multiple bottles of shampoo, shower gels, as well as scrunchies, shower caps and other assorted ladies toiletries. After moving several boxes of FamTax, he located the "Wax-U-Like, Smooth Leg Kit" and placed it on the top, before closing the doors.  
  
"Sheesh, you sure do keep a tidy cabinet, and an awful lot of personal hygiene stuff" he said aloud to the now sort of familiar reflection of Leela's face in the mirror.  
  
Taking the box for the cabinet, he walked out of the room and sat on her bed and began to read with horror, what Leg Waxing actually required him to do.  
  
"I've got to put hot wax onto my .. her legs, cover it with paper, and then when cool, peel it off" he anxiously said to himself.  
  
Leaning towards a control panel on the wall at the pillow end of the bed, he pressed the button to contact his cabin.  
  
"Fry here" came the response.  
  
"Leela it's me, you sure you want me wax your legs?" he asked nervously.  
  
"We don't know how long this will last, so yes, you're going to have to do it" came back the matter of fact response.  
  
"But I've got to put hot wax on your legs and then remove it, and that sounds painful"   
  
"I know that Fry, I've done it in the past. Just close your eyes, grit your teeth and pull on the paper as hard and as quick as you can, when the wax has cooled, then it won't hurt as much."  
  
"OK, I'll try it, but I don't want to ruin your legs for you."  
  
"Fry, just get on with it, they'll heal in time, plus my pants will cover any mistakes you make" she irritably answered before closing the connection.  
  
"Ok Fry, you're going to have to do this, otherwise you'll disappoint Leela.", he thought to himself, as he eventually leaned towards her feet and started to remove her boots.  
  
"I've always dreamed of undressing Leela, but not like this" as his mind wandered off at a tangent, when Leela's shapely legs came more into view, as he removed her pants.  
  
"Sheesh, there's nearly no hairs on these legs" he said aloud to himself, after he'd fully revealed her legs, and carefully folded the pants up next to the boots, before grabbing the box and heading back into the bathroom, closing the door after he'd entered.  
  
After filling the sink with boiling water and placing the tube of wax into it, he decided to make a closer inspection of the cabinet, in case Leela asked him to use anything else in there. A couple of minutes later, he gingerly rescued the tube, and sat down on the toilet, and stretched out her legs in front.  
  
"Guess I'd better do this now, otherwise I'll never start" he thought bravely to himself, as he opened the top of the tube and inserted the spatula provided.  
  
"JEEZ, OUCH! THAT HURTS!" he screamed as the spatula covered in hot wax, touched a naked leg for the first time. "How the HELL does Leela do this!" went though his pain shattered mind.  
  
"One-eye you alright, I heard your scream.", a familiar robotic voice yelled from the other side of the door.  
  
"Bender, what are you doing in my room, I was just removing some excess hair off Leela's ..err my legs. The wax is a bit hot" he quickly replied.  
  
"You human females, always removing things, unlike us robots" was the laconic response  
  
"I'd better not stop now, the wax will get too cold", he said to himself through gritted teeth, as he pushed the spatula down the legs, leaving a trail of wax, as quickly as he could he reached down and placed a piece of paper over it.   
  
"Phew, that wasn't that bad, better finish the rest off!" his subconscious told him. A couple of minutes later, and one near miss of waxing the back of a leg to the toilet, he looked with satisfaction at a pair of white paper covered legs.  
  
"Hey, you do have more than white tank tops" shouted Bender from the bedroom.  
  
"Bender, leave Leela's things .. err my things alone." he answered quickly.  
  
"There you go again, you and Fry are really screwy today, getting all mixed up."  
  
"It's my .. errr. time for … errr " stammered Leela/Fry as the words he wanted use dried up.  
  
"OK, not that I'm bothered, just never seen you this way before."  
  
"That's True! Boy are these legs itching" he thought  
  
"I'd better remove this wax, it's getting a little uncomfortable" he said to himself, as he reached down and gently started to pull a strip off of her legs. "HOLY HELL, THAT HURTS" he screamed at the top of her voice.  
  
"Let ole Bender help you" as the bathroom door opened.  
  
"Bender, it's rude to enter a women's toilet, unannounced" said a shocked Fry/Leela looking up, quickly placing a hand over her crotch.  
  
"Hey, I don't care. I'm a Man-Bot and have no interest in you, honey. I know what to do, Amy said she did this to her arms, last week" as he bent down and before Fry/Leela could react, pulled one the pieces of paper down the leg at pace. The ensuing scream that followed would have scared the pants off of any ghost.  
  
"Bender, you could have warned me. That stings!" was the eventual response through a tear filled eye.  
  
"Yeah, but then it wouldn't have been as funny"  
  
"That wasn't funny, now get out of my cabin and let me finish this, MYSELF" Fry/Leela shouted back and pointed towards the door, as he remembered that, what Bender had just done with the paper, was what Leela had told him to do earlier.  
  
"Sometimes you humans confuse me, one minute all brave, the next whimpering like a little animal" said Bender as he left the bathroom and then the cabin.  
  
"Humans, glad I'm not one" went through his brain, as he headed towards Fry's cabin.  
  
Reaching towards her knee, he grabbed hold of a piece of paper, closed her eye, gritted teeth and rapidly pulled it towards him. This time, the pain wasn't as bad, but water still escaped from the bottom of her eye. "Alright, I did it" he mentally congratulated himself, after he had a quick look. Then, he reached forward for the next section.  
  
"Hey jerkwad, you ought to see what Leela is doing" announced Bender as he walked into Fry's Cabin.  
  
"You've been in m.. there?" Leela/Fry responded.  
  
"Yeah, I was booze hunting, when I heard a scream, so I went to look"  
  
"Is she alright? I'd better go and find out" came the concerned response.  
  
"Nah, she knows what to do now, after I helped her."  
  
"What did you do?"  
  
"I showed her Amy's way of removing wax from her legs"  
  
"AMY'S WAY! I'd better go and see if she's alright" abruptly responded Leela/Fry as she barged past Bender and out the door.  
  
"Humans, no wonder I drink all this booze" muttered Bender as he turned and watched Fry leave the room.  
  
"That's all of the wax removed, and I can't see any difference" he said to himself, as he stood up to admire his work, once he'd removed the last of the paper after some time and a lot of willpower had been used up. Leaving the bathroom, he suddenly realised that he'd left white paper was strewn across the floor.   
  
"I'll tidy up after I've got her pants back on" he contemplated to himself as he sat down on the bed, and started to put them on.  
  
"Fry, you alright" asked Leela/Fry as she entered the cabin.  
  
"Yeah, look I did it without hurting your legs" as he stopped pulling up the pants, so the she could see.  
  
"You've done a good job, not bad for a first attempt"  
  
"Thanks. It really hurt at first" as he finished off pulling up her pants.  
  
"OK, now I know you're OK, I'm off to bed, see you tomorrow" Leela/Fry said as she turned and left the cabin.  
  
"Night Leela" Fry/Leela replied before closing the door after her, and then sat down on her bed and started to take off her tank top before realising that he had no idea of what Leela might wear in bed, if anything.  
  
"Guess she don't wear her bra and panties in bed, so I'll have to find something." he thought as he wandered over to her chest of drawers. Carefully avoiding the drawer marked underwear, he opened one of the others and found her night things.  
  
He looked in awe at the neatness of the drawer, her nightdresses all stacked on the left and her pyjamas all stacked on the right. After picking up one or two of the nightdresses, he walked over to the mirror and held them up to see how it would look on her body.   
  
"This one is sooo Leela!" he said holding up the low cut front, green satin one. "Have to see her in this" he added, before taking off her clothing and pulling the nightdress over her head and down her body, he gave a quick wiggle in front of the mirror and stood for a few seconds admiring the amount of cleavage showing.  
  
"I love to look at her body, so why do I feel wrong?" he thought after realising that it seemed strange for him to be ogling.  
  
"I hope she don't mind this, if we swap" he said to himself as he walked over to the bed and got in.  
  
To Be Concluded .. But When And In How Many More Installments?  
  
"The names have been changed (slightly) to protect the innocent? Any familiarity with people living (or like the authors maybe come - dead) is purely intentional and apologies to be offered if required. 


End file.
